The Tackle
A brother saves his sister starting a chain of events...
I didn't cross the line until two years after the Tackle, but I think I have to start with it. It was the high water mark of my high school experience, the turning point of how my sister and I viewed each other, and a really great hit, from a technical perspective.
It was after school at the very start of my senior year. I was dicking around with my friends, just hanging around at my car in the parking lot. We were talking about the weed we were going to smoke later and telling stupid jokes. Dumb teenager shit. That changed when Stevie ran up to me.
Stevie was one of my little sister's best friends. He was a super-nerd, like her. And like her, I had a lot of respect for him. I mean, he was tiny but pretty brave all things considered, and he treated my sister with respect when a lot of dudes just talked over her. Today he looked scared and of breath. I was immediately worried.
"Ja...Jamie...Bryan Harrison...behind the wall..." was all he got out, pointing in the direction of the short brick wall that fenced off school property from the public park next door. I could see Bryan's head but not my sister's. That wasn't a surprise as she was a lot shorter than him. It was a popular place for people to smoke and do mischief. I knew Bryan. I immediately thought of a few things that he could be doing, none of them good. I started sprinting around the wall.
When I turned the corner I could see a small circle of people standing around, not doing anything. I was angry then but later I didn't blame them. Most if not all of them were smaller than Bryan. Shit, everyone was smaller than him. It didn't matter to me though. I cared more about my sister than...well, anyone I guess. Certainly, more than my own well being.
I could see that two of her friends (Greg and Julian) were standing there shouting, but the lackeys were holding them back, which didn't cost them a lot of effort. Bless them for trying. I don't remember the lackey's names and I'm not sure I ever knew them. What bothered me was that they had looks of concern on their faces. Like what Bryan was doing had offended even their degenerate consciences. I sped up.
He should have seen me coming. I was pissed as hell and moving like a freight train. He was too focused on trying to peel back my little sister's shirt from where he had just torn it.
He was a few inches taller than me and definitely stronger. But it turns out if you're moving fast enough and don't care if you hurt yourself, you can take pretty much anyone out. I performed a picture perfect shoulder tackle, blindsiding him with terrific force. We hit the ground together, but only I was expecting the impact. So I was swinging already and he still didn't know what was going on. The look of surprise on his face as my fist hit him the first time was priceless. I don't remember a lot of the rest of the fight. I know that I landed a few more punches before a tall guy from the football team pulled me off of him. I remember that he was laughing and I thought that was strange but mostly I was still too mad and shouting curses at Bryan to care.
My little sister looked at me, shocked at first, then grateful, then worried. She had already made the connection that I would get in trouble. She was a lot smarter than I was. Still is. I rolled my eyes at her dramatically, letting her know what I thought of that bullshit. She smiled a little at that. That made it all worthwhile.
She had some bad dreams for a while but bounced back remarkably quickly. Mom was great and supportive and took her to someone to talk to right away.
My parents told me that fighting was bad except for very unusual occasions like this, but Mom hugged me and Dad gave me a beer and then they bought me a game system. They were both pacifists more or less so I don't think they could have brought themselves to actually say "Good job kicking his ass" but I knew that they were proud of me and that was enough.
I was threatened with suspension. But it turns out that everyone hated Bryan, so lots of people stepped forward and told the staff that he was basically trying to molest my sister. That got me downgraded to detention. I was ok with that, but my Dad went to the superintendent of the district and said:
"So. If my son hadn't been there, who, specifically, would have stopped that sexual predator from raping my daughter?"
The next day, as if by magic, I was released from detention with a Stern Warning about Proper Behavior and Reporting Crimes to the Authorities. I nodded and agreed and thanked the principal and then left his office before I started laughing. I love my Dad.
I was worried about Bryan retaliating but he was arrested for what he had done and then other girls started coming forward. He was a juvenile but he didn't get out till he was an adult. Last I heard he was only on the outside for about a month before being arrested for trying to force a kid into his van. So this is where he exits our story.
So. My one brave act, everyone ends up ok. Happy ending. Story over. Roll credits. Everyone go home.
No. This was, as it turned out, just the prelude. The main performance was yet to come.
---
Best Friends
---
The Tackle led me to Irwin. And without him being in my life the, uh, more socially unacceptable elements of this story would never have happened.
Although I'd of course seen him around, we never really spoke until about a week later. It was lunch and I was eating at the cafeteria when someone sat down across from me. It was the kid who pulled me off of Bryan. He was tall and lanky and smiling. He just sat there for a moment, and then laughed.
"What?" I said, curious but not annoyed. He's honestly good-natured enough that its almost impossible to be annoyed with him.
"I was just thinking about when you hit Bryan again. Whenever I do I end up laughing. It was so beautiful. The best tackle I've ever seen, really. Oh, I'm Irwin, by the way."
I smiled despite myself.
"That bastard deserves worse than a beat down," I said, grimly.
"He does," Irwin said, still smiling, "but for now he's out of the picture, and a lot of girls and a few boys have you to thank. I really didn't see it coming either. You probably didn't notice me at first, being as focused as you were, but I was in that circle of gawkers. I had been walking towards Bryan, slowly. I knew that I'd get hurt if I interfered. I'd fight, sure, but it was inevitable. I just kept telling myself that I couldn't watch this happen and not do anything."
I smiled again, wider this time.
"That makes me feel a little better about humanity."
"Well, I still don't know if I really had the balls for it. I could still have backed down. Right when I was reaching the point of no return I saw a blur go past me at about a hundred miles an hour. Next thing I knew Bryan was on the ground, bleeding, and you were beating the shit out of him. If the yearbook committee asks me what the best part of Senior year was for me, I'm gonna tell them about that tackle." He laughed again. It was infectious and I joined him.
"Seriously though, you should try out for the team. Our secondary is weak, you could easily walk on as like a free safety or something. I play corner, I know talent."
I'd never even considered trying out for the team. I was a laid-back guy, not really into sports, and my parents were both basically ex-hippies. Not the sort to have football around. But Irwin's words had a certain appeal to me.
"Yeah, ok. I'll talk to the coach. You owe me when he laughs me off the field though."
"Never happen. He already knows about your skills, I made sure of it. We'll talk more after your first practice."
I spoke to the coach that afternoon, and to my surprise, he signed me up right away. The secondary was really weak. The current safeties were both sophomores and not really big enough to do the job well despite their speed.
Irwin introduced me around, showed me the ropes. He also explained, in great detail, how much pussy I was going to be drowning in just from being on the team. He was being half-truthful, but he did it in a hilariously over-the-top fashion. He was dating Trina, who I had a crush on, but there was no element of competition or jealousy. I was more of a slut than him, so I rotated through a bunch of on-again/off-again booty calls. 'No attachments, no problems' was my motto.
He gave good advice about women, life choices, everything, really. I was a good listener and friend, always had his back, always ready to help. On the field, he was the master of interceptions and I became the secondary's best tackler. In short, we became best friends. We still are.
I don't regret any part of my relationship with Irwin, but it would have some pretty fateful consequences later on.
---
Am I Attractive?
---
About a month after the incident, life had largely returned to normal. My parents didn't really approve of me playing football, but this was before the whole concussion thing was a big deal and I was really only going to be on the field for a single year. To their surprise, they enjoyed coming to the games. Even Jamie went, which was nice of her. If there was anyone less interested in football than she was, I'd never met them.
Now would be a good time to talk a little about Jamie, my little sister. She was and is the smartest person I know. She'd say I was biased but its really just the truth. In my senior year of high-school I was unashamed that she was helping me with my homework regularly in math and science, and even editing my essays. She was only a sophomore but she was taking AP courses and hit the honor roll every semester.
Jamie was a nerd. Again, I don't say this with any negative connotations. Maybe if I was in a typical family it would have been an issue, I dunno, but our parents just let us be ourselves. So I was a laid back popular guy with decent grades and she was a nerdy genius. She hung with a crew of fellow nerds (Greg, Stevie, and Julian) who were and are still friends. She loved a lot of the typical stuff you'd expect: Star Trek, Dungeons & Dragons (she was the regular DM for her group), Doctor Who, Anime, and Comic Books (but only indie titles). She never let gender roles hold her to anything she wasn't interested in. About the only completely stereotypical "girl interest" that she participated in was a huge and well-read collection of "Shoujo Manga" which basically amounted to extremely dramatic romance stories targeted at teen girls.
She would frequently share her thoughts on all of these subjects, talking about fan-theories, bouncing ideas for dungeons off of me, asking me for costume advice. She knew it wasn't my thing but I had no problems participating. I even went to a couple of cons with her and had fun. Her passions were part of what made her so wonderful. For her part, if I wanted to see an action movie or go for a hike or something, she joined in too, even if she wasn't interested or in the best of shape. We were good friends.
Where I managed to be a good brother to her though was in the fields of protection (as you have seen) and advice. She had real problems relating to some people. Boys in high school are already jerks, but if she had to talk to one who was even remotely attractive she got super-shy and really had no idea how to flirt. On top of that, she was convinced that she was the least appealing girl in her class. It was a self-esteem problem which went back to being bullied back in elementary school by people like Bryan.
So, like I said, it was about a month after the incident. The school had stopped talking about it and things were back to normal, for the most part. I was very grateful that Jamie seemed to be less anxious. I knew that she would have to deal with some trauma from it for a long time but I hoped that most of it had faded. On more than one night she'd come into my room after a really bad nightmare that she refused to talk about. I let her sleep in my bed. It was the only thing I could do for her and no, it wasn't weird because I'd just sleep on the floor. She felt protected having her big brother in the room and that was enough for me.
On that day I was doing calc homework and had asked her for help earlier so I was expecting her at some point. She was never exactly the most punctual girl so typically she'd just wander in. We had an open door policy where nobody had to knock unless the door was closed. Privacy was strictly enforced though. It was not unusual for us to study together whether one of us was helping the other or not, in either of our rooms. Most of the time with the doors opened, but if we needed to concentrate or we ended up talking about unrelated gossip or whatever we might close the door. No biggie because nobody was misbehaving. Mom and Dad were so used to it they never really bothered to check up on us. I guess I should be thanking God for that because of what happened later, but for now, it wasn't even something we thought of.
On this day she came in, carrying her notebook and calculator, but she closed the door behind her before sitting on my bed. That really wasn't necessary for studying, so I expected something like what she said next.
"Bro, can I ask you something?"
She said it in kind of a sad and resigned way. If there was anything that triggered my protectiveness, it was that voice. I immediately stopped working, stood up from my desk and sat next to her.
"What's up, tiny?"
Tiny had been my name for her since she was literally tiny, around age five. No one else anywhere could get away with comments about her height. She liked being tiny compared to me.
"Do you...do you think I'm attractive?"
This surprised me a bit. Like I said earlier, I knew about her self-esteem issues but she'd never addressed this kind of question so directly to me before. The fact was that as of sophomore year, she was cute. Really cute. She was short, kind of petite, with shoulder-length blonde hair that she kept simple. Her glasses (because of course she had to wear glasses) were not old-fashioned but stylish. They perfectly framed her brown eyes and made them look bigger. She learned how to do her makeup from youtube, largely for the purposes of cosplay, but she was an expert and the same skills applied. This is uncomfortable for me to talk about given her age and the fact that she was my sister, but I think its relevant. She was slender as a lot of teen girls were, but even then she had curves. I could tell that the boys her age noticed, even though she didn't really dress to emphasize them.
I mean, had I not been her brother, I'd have been into her at least a little. That's really part of the problem. But I'm getting ahead of myself. At this moment, I wasn't prepared to tell my sister that she was kind of hot. Maybe I just should have, but I didn't. I went with safe and non-specific.
"Yes. You are super-cute. For real."
She smiled a little.
"Yeah but you have to say that. You're my big brother. Its like part of the deal."
"No, I don't. I'd tell you if you were an uggo. I'd be all like 'Yes, you are the tiniest of uggos'"
She laughed, which was great to hear. But she turned serious again.
"Well...why are no boys interested in me?"
"Are we talking about all boys? Because I could probably find some who are. Or specific boys?"
The thing about Jamie was she was a romantic for sure. She had crushes like other people had tic-tacs: A handful all at once.
"Well...like Stevie. I...I've always kinda liked him. And we hang out all the time, but he doesn't even check me out!"
"Honey, Stevie never checks you out because he's too busy checking me out. He's like the gayest kid I know. Not that I care, its an ego boost, but you can't really use him as a yardstick for your attractiveness."
Her eyes got big. I could see that it never crossed her mind. She was close to Stevie, I'm sure that they'd had numerous heart-to-heart conversations about a variety of topics, but she still had trouble reading him.
"Look. I desperately need help with this problem and you're super cute and you probably need to hook up Stevie with someone before he gets desperate and starts following strange men to their cars."
She finally burst out laughing and I joined her. When she was done she helped me with my homework. All was well.
I still wonder what would have happened if I had just been a little more truthful and honestly laid out the ways in which she was genuinely attractive to me, specifically. Maybe it would have made things weirder, or maybe it would have prevented some other things. No way to know, I guess.
Every now and then over the next two years she'd come and ask me a similar question, or about why a given boy didn't like her the way she liked him. She had some seriously bad luck in that she'd fall for boys who were unavailable for a variety of reasons, but even when I told her that a boy probably did like her, she'd be too nervous to approach him or even respond if he started talking to her.
I ended up holding her a lot while she cried when these boys she liked broke her heart by accident by going out with other girls. I felt bad for her, but I also knew that her situation wasn't that unusual, really. I told her what I thought was the truth: High School would end. College would be better. Wait, you'll see.
I mean, it was true for me so it would have to be true for her, right?`
---
Two Years Later
---
Time passed. Irwin and I graduated. He got a football scholarship to the local city college. I walked on as safety again, but I was mostly a backup. We were in college. The professors mostly treated us like adults, the classes were more interesting, the girls were exponentially hotter, and things were generally looking up.
Irwin surprised everyone and went pre-law, although he confessed that the humanities interested him more, his major kept his dad off of his back. I pursued being an athletic trainer for college sports, which in and of itself was no joke and would require a master's degree if I wanted to get anywhere with it. Trina followed Irwin, but the college also had solid biology and art programs, which was what she wanted to pursue. They were also getting more serious, which I think surprised both of them.
Irwin and Trina lived on campus, but I needed to save money so I lived at home. It was kind of a pain but was common, and my parents gave me plenty of privacy and never bothered me when I came home stoned at 4 am. I got a job doing all kinds of stuff at the university gym, and the money I saved by not needing to pay rent allowed me to go on trips with a variety of attractive women for pretty much the entire summer after freshman year. Oh yeah, I was even more successful in college, where my laid-back attitude and complete lack of aggressive masculinity played well with mature young women who were tired of being treated like objects or something you put nice behavior in and expected sex out of.
In fact, Trina had started calling me a slut and while Irwin defended me (as a good bestie should) he privately asked me if I was ever going to actually date anyone. Well, I'd tell him, it's not like I'm lying to these girls. I'd always explain exactly what kind of relationship we'd have: it would be fun, we'd go to interesting places, we'd have sex and she'd have orgasms. Besides, I didn't really have any emotional connection with any of them beyond friendship.
My entire first year was a bit of a blur, being busy or getting busy most of the time. The summer was also pretty busy. I was either working for cash or spending that cash on trips with various girls. At the start of my sophomore year in college I was starting to tire out a bit. Constantly being out late, playing football (even as a second stringer) and working was running me ragged. I finally decided I had to quit football. I was doing it for fun and it wasn't anymore, plus I had a minor ankle injury that I was worried might impact other areas of my life. Fall break found me doing something that I rarely did: staying at home and resting.
Jamie was over the moon. It wasn't like I meant to ignore her, but I do have to admit that I had seen a lot less of her since college started. And while I could keep my hoe-ing secret from Mom and Dad, Jamie didn't approve. I explained that I wasn't taking advantage of anyone or lying or cheating, but she'd just narrow her eyes and shake her head. I really didn't like that I might be disappointing her. That was really the first time that my lifestyle haunted me at all. I made the decision that I would start spending more spare time with her, starting with this break. I loved her and she still looked up to me. I didn't want her to start to resent me.
In any case, we still got along fine. She was a senior in high school now, taking college-level courses. We had an hours-long conversation and got each other caught up on our lives. I told her about Irwin's success on the field (she liked him too but in a second big brother kind of way), Trina's research opportunities and painting-shows (Jamie really looked up to her), and my grades, which were actually pretty great.
I was sure to tell her that I still used her study techniques and that the base of knowledge that she helped me establish had made my courses much easier. This seemed to take the sting out of me not being around much last summer due to my, uh, activities.
She told me about her group. Stevie and Greg had hooked up, which I agreed was excellent news. Julian was following in my footsteps and seemed to have the goal of sleeping with every boy and girl in the Art Club. I shook my head disapprovingly but privately cheered him in his quest. They were all still very close friends and played D&D together. A girl named Ellie had joined their crew this year and they had become fast friends. Ellie was also pretty awkward and was a good source of moral support for her with regards to romantic troubles. I noted that Jamie said that she was cute for future reference but even I was a little bit loathe to try to seduce my sisters best friend.
After we got caught up, I took her out to dinner. I decided that I'd spend the money that I usually spent on being a degenerate on Jamie this break, both to assuage my guilt and maybe boost her self-esteem a little. I really did love hanging out with her and showing it more couldn't help. It was more or less a date, sort of. In the back of my mind, I was thinking that if she got used to interacting with men in social situations then she might have more luck. At this point, I was cheering for my sister to find a boy that she liked and have a great first sexual experience but I was conflicted about the idea of anyone, even a generally good person, taking her virginity. I wrote that feeling off as just being a good protective big brother, but I don't think that covered it.
I think it was jealousy.
We went to a local steakhouse, the sort of place that isn't too expensive, but that's still classy enough to turn down the lights at night and light some candles. We didn't dress up or anything, I really wanted this to be casual and relaxed. It was good to be with a girl I felt an emotional connection to, and I wanted to continue the same sort of easy conversation that we had earlier that day. She was smiling when the server seated us.
"Wow. I don't think I've been here without Mom and Dad. It's ...different with you."
"Well," I philosophized, "You can swear as much as you fucking want to. And get me to tell you stories that I'd never talk about in front of the parents. Oh, and I might sneak you some wine if you're good, Tiny."
She laughed, playing along.
"Hmm. I don't know. You have something of a reputation, dear brother. You might just be getting me drunk to take advantage of me. Many of my peers have remarked that my elder sibling was 'totally fuckable, but a complete slut'."
I almost spit out my water. I'd never heard her talk like that before. It was equally shocking and hilarious. I managed to keep it together enough to respond with mock seriousness.
"Please don't slut-shame me. I'm expressing my natural tendencies in an ethical fashion."
She rolled her eyes dramatically, but then her mouth turned down into a small frown. It was the look she had when she was sad but trying not to show it. I paid attention.
"Seriously. Why do you...do that? I mean, go out with so many girls. Or just sleep with them. Are they like challenges to overcome and when you're done with them you put your trophy on the shelf and forget about it?"
I was taken aback by this. I knew men who thought like that. I never did though. I barely thought about consquences at all. Maybe that was the problem. I decided that now was as good a time as any for transparency.
"No. I'd never do that. I've sincerely enjoyed being with every girl that I've dated. I'm friends with most of them. And it's not like I just jump to a new girl's bed every time I get horny. I have, uh, 'regulars'. I guess, to answer your question, I do it because I have needs and desires like anyone else. And..."
I trailed off, unsure about going deeper.
"And?" she said, suddenly very interested.
I sighed.
"And, I don't feel anything for them beyond friendship. What I do feel is real, and some of them are among the people I trust the most, but there's nothing deeper. I tried to date women without that spark but I end up feeling a lot worse than if we kept it light and fun because I would be deceiving at least them and maybe myself. And it ends badly."
At that point, the server came back and broke up the heavy mood. Thank god. I ordered the ribeye and she got the prime rib. I raised my eyebrows but didn't complain. She smirked at me afterward. Was this revenge for what she saw as my bad behavior? What she said next made me think that it was. Well, it just made me think in general.
She looked away, face getting a bit melancholy.
"I know you aren't vain or full of yourself, but maybe it might help if you weren't so humble. Have you ever considered that girls...women too I guess, might see you as something other than a one night stand? That they see a very kind, generous, loving person who also happens to be hot? And maybe you aren't lying, but some of them go out with you thinking or hoping that maybe they will be the one that you'll feel something for? I know you aren't really to blame but...I can't help but think you have some responsibility. I know you've broken some hearts. Once I had a drunk blonde girl yell at me at a party. I had no idea who she was but apparently she didn't even warrant a second booty call. I yelled back at her until she burst into tears. Then I ended up talking her down outside. She just kept asking me what was wrong with her that you didn't love her. It was so sad."
Holy shit. I've never claimed to be a smart person. I'm proud of the grades I get in my program because it's difficult, but I get there through work, not naturally. It had honestly never even occurred to me that the girls that I slept with might see me as something more than I see them as. I was honest, right? I never lied or cheated. I always behaved ethically.
Then why did I feel so awful? Dammit.
"The girl was Amy. I remember that she looked a little like you, but not as pretty. I got some drunken calls and texts from her that were...pretty emotional. I just wrote her off as being crazy. I never meant to hurt her. I'm sorry."
I don't know who I was apologizing to. Amy? Jamie? Both of them at the same time? And wait, did I just admit that Amy looked like my sister but not as attractive? Amy was, for the record, extremely hot. Fuck. Well, hopefully, she'd forget about that.
Jamie reached out and took my hand, her eyes understanding.
"I'm not trying to make you feel bad, I swear. I just know you is all. If one of your partners did something extreme to hurt themselves you'd never forgive yourself. Hell, if Amy walked in here and shot you then you'd feel guilty that she went to jail. That's who you are."
I laughed at the image, as dark as it was. Jamie laughed too. I took this as an opportunity to lighten things up a little as well.
"Ok. Well, here is my proposal. Tonight will be a learning experience. For both of us. This is now officially a date."
Her eyes got huge and I tried not to laugh. I continued.
"What I mean is, we'll do some roleplaying. We'll pretend to be on a first date. I'll be on my best behavior, trying to get to know you as a person rather than just try to jump in the sack with you. I'll make conversation and won't be slutty. And you can practice being out with a man and flirting. You always worry about making mistakes but you know I don't judge so you can be yourself and relax. Win-win."
She reached over, grabbed my wine and took a big sip, then set it down.
"All right," she said softly, "but you have to really act like you're my date. And tell me how I did at the end of the night. And be honest."
"Agreed," I said, not even remotely considering the implications of any part of what Jamie had just said.
She squeezed my hand. I suddenly realized that we had been holding hands for a few minutes now. It just seemed right and natural. After what I'd just said I squeezed back. Had to keep up appearances, and this seemed romantic without being overtly sexual in nature. That's what I told myself, anyway.
The dinner passed. The food was good, the company better. She was flirtatious in a way that I'd never seen before. She was witty, of course, so she could complement and double-entendre as well as anyone, and she found excuses to touch me with her hand or rub her foot against my leg. Every now and then I said something challenging. Nothing major. I'd be very direct with a question or flirt right back at her. These were things that I knew from experience made her freeze up, or feel awkward. She did a pretty good job. Sometimes she would get a look like a deer in headlights for a moment and then steal some of my wine before answering.
To be honest, she stole a lot of my wine. As the evening went on she got bolder. Nothing too serious but by the time I paid the check her hand was on my knee more often than not and she was giving me looks that I could only describe as 'bedroom eyes'. I realized that she had slipped into the role of the pursuer and because I was trying not to be overly forward I had become 'hard to get'. It was an interesting role reversal and I found it enticing.
Maybe enticing isn't the right word. Maybe arousing is.
Driving her home was an adventure. I began to get actively worried that she was going to try...something. I wasn't sure exactly what but I knew that I couldn't let this go too far, especially after just making a big deal about trying not to sleep around. And that's beside the whole point of her being my little sister.
How was it an adventure, you ask? Well, her hand didn't leave my knee the whole way home. I moved it off, shifted around, but all that happened was that it moved up to my thigh. I was worried if I resisted any more she would end up giving me a hand job. And the looks she was shooting me were smoldering. If I would have been with someone else there would have been no doubt whatsoever that we would be fucking later.
When we got home I opened her door for her, and thankfully, things defused a bit when she released her loud, delightfully nerdy laugh.
"Oh my god that was so much fun. I didn't freak you out too much, did I? I...I just got really into it. It was so fun just being sexy and...and watching a man react to it how I wanted him to. And you were trying so hard to be on your best behavior so you were a little nervous and that made me feel better about feeling nervous."
It all rushed out of her and I felt relieved. She was just really into the whole scenario, so my idea was as much a success for her as it was good practice for me being a little more restrained. Great. But she went on.
"So," she said more hesitantly, "How did I do? You promised to tell me, remember? Be honest, even if it hurts a little. I...I know that you care about me and just want me to do well so criticism is ok."
Well, this I could do. I was glad I could be both honest and positive.
"Uh, you were amazing. I was struggling to be on my best behavior. You were, without a doubt, the most seductive girl that I've ever been on a date with. The way you were talking and touching me drove me wild. I was honestly worried about what would happen when we got home. I only have so much willpower."
Her face and changed, going from light to serious. I could tell, however, that it was because she was touched by my words rather than offended or depressed by them. I paused for a moment, then had another thought. Any sensible person would have kept it to themselves. I guess I had a lot of wine too.
"Oh, and of course neither of us really dressed up for a date. But your body in jeans and a sweatshirt is way more hot than any other girl I've been with in the skimpiest slinky dress."
Her face got even more serious and took on an odd cast like she had just seen something surprising. I realized immediately that I had gone too far by commenting on how amazing her body was, but I couldn't take it back. Not without hurting her or lying.
So I've been avoiding talking about this because it forces me to examine what I've repressed for years. Jamie...had changed.
Hey, we all do. Puberty, right? It turns out that Jamie was a late bloomer. I told you earlier that she was a hottie in her sophomore year. And she was, just petite and slender. She was still petite, but no-one who looked at her would think "slender" anymore.
The phrase that they would use, the one that I had overheard other men use, would be "extremely fuckable". A nicer way to say it would be voluptuous. She was about the same height but she'd let her hair grow longer. Her glasses were new but just as fashionable. Her makeup skills were even better. While it was simple that night she could easily go from anywhere between "perfect contour" to "sexy goth". But the stuff out of her control was what had really changed.
Her hips had widened out and her ass had grown a little and taken on the shape of a perfect upside-down heart. It wasn't flat, either, but flared out into something round that would fit into the hand nicely. Her waist had not grown, giving her an amazing hourglass. And to top it off (literally) her bust had increased. Significantly. I'm sure it was "only" a C-cup, but on her petite frame her firm breasts pushed at any material and it was clear that there was no sag, either.
I didn't just feel bad because I had quite obviously said that my little sister was hot as fuck, but also because she was still getting used to being so. She didn't like showing off her body in part because of how creepier older men had treated her. I didn't want to be added to the list of men she felt that she couldn't trust, nor did I want her to think that was the only way that I saw her.
She had a strange smile on her face. I'd never seen it before, which naturally worried me. Then she bit her lip, and I got really worried. I was too slow to prevent what happened next, or I just didn't want to. She reached up and put her hand on the side of my face. And then she leaned in and kissed me.
It wasn't chaste. It wasn't a sister kissing her brother. As soon as it started, I responded, and as soon as I did, I felt her tongue dart into my mouth. I instinctively reached out to hold her, thank god I grabbed her shoulders. Unfortunately, that seemed to remind her that she, too, had hands, and they weren't all that busy. Suddenly both of her hands were running through my hair, along my back, even pulling at my shirt to get underneath and touch my skin. This was something that was one of my personal turn-ons. Feeling a woman's hands on me when she clearly wants me drives me wild, even if she isn't touching anything particularly sensitive.
At this point, we were making out heavily, the kind of kissing where you aren't breathing enough and will have to stop soon to catch your breath before you go back in and escalate further. Jamie didn't wait for that. Suddenly, I felt her small hand grasping my now-hard cock right through my jeans. I stopped kissing her instinctively and said her name, like a moan. Like a lover.
"Jaimie, god..."
That seemed to wake her up. She released my cock, much to my disappointment, and stepped back. Her hand was on her mouth. She was clearly in shock. Oh fuck, I'd done it now...I was sure of it. But I wasn't really thinking clearly about the sequence of events.
"I...I'm sorry," she said, "I, uh, need to go..."
And then she turned and ran inside the house. I couldn't see her anymore but I knew that she ran up the stairs to her room and that I would find the door closed when I went after her.
Well, shit.
---
Irwin's Story
---
I didn't bother Jamie that night. I knew it would make things worse. The following morning I ran into her in the hall and tried to talk to her. I opened my mouth but she spoke over me, talking fast and clearly wanting to be nowhere near me.
"I can't right now please leave me alone ok I love you."
It was the way she spoke when she was anxious or feeling really low. Mom and Dad noticed the way she was and exchanged a look but they didn't say anything. The truth was that she was, in fact, smarter than all of us. I know that all of us worried about her but none of us wanted to make anything worse by pushing. She would, normally, eventually open up to someone. Most often me. I doubted she would be talking to anyone about this.
I felt that I'd triggered this so I couldn't do nothing. I had to save my sister. This was worse than Bryan, in that I couldn't just tackle it head on and hope for victory. I needed help, so I went to the person I knew who gave the best advice.
"Irwin dude, I know you were planning on leaving this afternoon but I need your help."
"Whoa, calm down, dude. I got time for you. The girl will understand if we have to leave a little later. What do you need?"
I stopped and thought about somewhere we could talk without family or friends.
"Hey, the college library will be empty, meet me there in a half hour. Oh, and, uh, come alone. Its kind of sensitive," I said kind of sheepishly. Irwin trusted Trina implicitly and I did for the most part, too. I was more worried about judgment than my secrets getting out.
We met and took the elevator up to the seventh floor, which was the sociology and psychology section. It was usually pretty quiet when class was in session but during the break it was dead. Irwin and I were the only ones there. We sat at one of the old wooden desks. Despite knowing we were alone, I talked low, almost a whisper. I was ashamed, but I knew that Irwin would, at least, know what to say to make me look at this rationally. I explained everything, watching his eyebrows rise in shock. I finished explaining the chain of events.
I stopped talking. Irwin sat back. I gave him time. I knew that he was thinking. He only thought fast on the field, otherwise, he took his time, considering things from all angles. It was reassuring to watch.
"Ok, bro. I think I know what you gotta do, but you're gonna need to listen to me really closely. Maybe you'll like it, probably not. I can't and won't tell you what the right path is, but maybe I can help you figure it out."
I took a deep breath.
"All right. I'm listening."
"Cool. You're gonna need to settle in because I have a story for you. The problem here is that you're thinking conventionally, and only from your perspective. Once I explain things to you I think you'll understand a little better. Oh, and no-one can know about what I'm going to tell you."
That surprised me. I thought I was doing all the shameful admissions today. Irwin began to speak and I didn't interrupt him. He was doing me a favor, after all.
"I've told you before that I'm dyslexic and also needed a speech therapist in elementary and middle school. It was rough, but I don't like to complain about it now. I'm doing ok, after all. I never really told you what it did to me, though."
"I was shorter, lonely, and bullied. And I survived but every year things didn't seem to get better. I know that the speech therapy helped and my reading was improving, which also improved my grades, but my social life and confidence were going in the opposite direction."
"It got to the point where I just gave up. I did my homework, went to school, but refused to do anything else. I stopped trying to make friends, wouldn't play any sports. I spent all my time in my room. My parents didn't know what to do. They tried to convince me to go out with them and were really too pushy about it. I stopped talking to them to except when I absolutely needed to."
"In my freshman year, Rebecca intervened. You know her, you know what she's like."
I did know her. She was about three years older than Irwin. They were close (although I had no idea how far that went). I'd met her a lot, she was friendly and fun. She was very curious and liked to joke around. Never a mean word from her. I even noticed that she and Trina had become friends. Not only that, but she was, pardon my terminology, stacked. She was tall, brunette, great breasts, athletic, and didn't like bras. She knew that I noticed but didn't care as long as I wasn't a creep about it. She had just graduated from a private college and was trying to find work in a much larger city to the north. I hadn't seen her in a while and I wondered what she'd been up to.
"Yeah, so she basically just opened my door and came in. No knocks. She never did that. She loved that I respected her privacy so she did the same. She sat next to me on the bed. Just sat. I was too stunned to complain. Then she kissed me on the head and told me that she was taking me somewhere. It wasn't an order. It was more like this was how things were and she was just letting me know as a courtesy."
"So I went with her. It turns out she was just taking me to hang out with some of her friends at the coffee shop. These were artists, drama geeks, political junkies, some from the college, some from our school, some who were a lot older. What she knew, and I didn't, was that they may have been odd and critical of each other they were extremely accepting. There wasn't a question of why she brought me, or if I could even do anything important. No one even expected me to say anything. So I listened. They had amazing conversations, and I got to drink coffee."
"We'd talk on the way back about what happened. She'd ask me what I thought and really listened. Going to the coffee shop started becoming my favorite part of the week and my favorite part of that was the car ride back."
"She didn't take me every day, but every time she went, I went with her. People started talking to me, although they weren't offended when I refused to say anything back. Eventually, after a month, someone asked me what I thought about their art. And I was sensitive, you know? Like if I had done some art I would be fucked up if I asked about it and there was no answer. So I did answer. And I had been paying attention to her, so I knew that she was trying to show deep emotions through painted landscapes. I told her what I thought of each one, specifically and in a detailed fashion. She was shocked and flattered and even blushed a little bit. I'm sure in retrospect she was just being kind when she asked me, maybe thought I was cute, sure, ask the quiet boy, he'll be safe. My sister laughed but it was just a happy laugh."
"That's how she saved me. And I loved her for it, more than anything. Still do. I had one more problem though."
"I'd started dating Trina. She was the artist. You'd guessed that. She still paints. This would have been Junior year, so we hadn't become friends. I felt better than I had in years, tried out for the team, but inside there was still a seed of that doubt. Trina was ready to escalate things, she knew that I was excited. That I liked getting her off with my hands. But I never let her do anything for me. I knew, really knew, that I was ugly. And that as soon as she felt, saw, or tasted my cock she would be disgusted and that would be it. She was the best thing in my life and I wanted her but I could tell that she was getting anxious that I wasn't actually interested. And I know now that Trina would have understood. Would have been eager to show me how wrong I was."
"So this was still before we'd really started hanging out. I'd just turned eighteen and was getting more and more anxious again. Eventually, Rebecca just asks me whats wrong. So I tell her. It's like this barrier that I can't get past in my head. I've thought about myself as being worthless for so long that there is still a part of me that won't admit that Trina wants me. That all of my success is just an act and as soon as we're naked together she'll realize it and dump me."
"She suddenly gets really serious and I worry that I've offended her. She gets up and closes the door then sits back down. She says 'Close your eyes, please,' in the quietest voice I've ever heard her use. I do. I hear something soft and rustling, don't know what it is, then I feel her hand on my chest."
"She starts talking again: 'I like Trina. She's good for you. I would have asked you to dump anyone else. So...just promise...promise me that if you two ever break up that you'll come to talk to me before you start seeing anyone else. I don't care if it happens next week or in twenty years.' I nod but that's not enough. 'Say it out loud. I need to hear it,' she says. "
"So I'm really confused but Rebecca is kind of my hero. I love her more than pretty much anyone and if she told me I needed to jump out of a moving car for her then I'd probably do it. 'I promise.' That's when I feel her lips on mine, and she isn't moving slowly. It's still probably the most passionate kiss I've ever had."
"I open my eyes and she's topless on my bed. She sits back suddenly and covers herself with her hands. Like she isn't gorgeous. You know she is. Every dude I've brought by has either said some gross shit about her or checked her out. And she's even more amazing without clothes. I look at her and I realize a few things. One, I love her more than a sister. Somewhere along the lines of hanging out with her constantly, my gratitude shifted to something else. Two, she loves me even more than I love her, and she's been going through something. She wasn't just trying to help her brother, she was trying to save the guy she loved. Three, she's at least as worried of what I'd think of her appearance as I am about what Trina would think."
"'Irwin, will you let me be your first?' she says, her voice trembling. I don't need to be told twice. Next thing I'm kissing her on her breasts and we're tearing each other's clothes off. Somehow I hold out long enough to make her cum, I don't know how. I cum inside her, and we stay and make out. She cried a little after too. At first I was worried that I hurt her but I figured out pretty quickly that while she'd never attempt to break up my relationship, she wasn't really ok with me seeing other girls. We, uh, try to be good, but every couple of months we slip and end up fucking. I should feel guilty but its brought us even closer together."
"And that's how it is. Thanks to Rebecca I got over my fear. I'm still with Trina, we're in love for sure and getting more serious, not less. Rebecca still dates but it never really goes anywhere. I have no idea how this going to end up. So that's the bad part I guess. But those are my problems, not yours."
"You've got some stuff you need to face up to before you make any decisions. Some shit I think you just missed because you're too close to it, which is understandable, but you're also totally in denial and it's going to fuck your life up if you don't acknowledge it. Also, I don't have a lot of time so I'm going to be blunt."
I was stunned by his story but still listening. I had about a billion questions, but he didn't let me ask them. I wasn't bothered by him being blunt. I felt that I was missing something important, and if he had to kick my ass a little to help me, well that's what best friends were for.
"You know that your sister looks up to you, right?"
"Yeah."
"That was how it used to be. Then, two years ago you saved her just like Rebecca saved me. You might not have noticed but on that day you became her hero. Hell, you became a lot more popular with all the girls then, but her? She was done. Trina and I have both seen how she looks at you, but the real giveaway is when you come into a room. She turns her whole body to face you and smiles. It's always huge and real. She loves you, and I mean really. You were shocked when she kissed you and felt you up but I guarantee she's been thinking about that for years. Any decision you make has to take into account that you could break her heart with a single word."
Well, shit. That was something that I definitely didn't want to do.
"Ok, so what's the other thing."
He smiled.
"Don't hate the messenger. You're at least as much in love with her as she is with you. I can't be sure but I think you were into her before you saved her. Its just gotten stronger as time's gone on."
I opened my mouth to protest but he held his hand up to stop me
"You've been in serious denial. I've thought about talking to you about it. You would do anything for her but she probably thinks you don't like her anymore because of the way you've been avoiding her for the last year or so. You made yourself so busy with football, work, school, and women that you basically never saw her even though you are living at home. Oh, and this is probably why you never form any connections with other girls. You already have one, and nothing else is strong enough to even compete with it."
He was done. I think he was waiting for me to object or argue, but I sat and thought for about a minute. Everything checked out. All of it.
"Well, shit," I said, "I've gotta do something about this."
Not that I had any idea what to do. Or rather I did have some ideas. Now that I was confronting my most repressed desires, it turns out I had a lot of ideas. Irwin looked at his phone, swore, and stood up.
"Dude, I gotta go. Trina is patient but if I make her wait any longer she'll worry. Feel free to call, but I know you'll do whatever is best for you and Jamie. Fuck society though. Worry about yourselves. If you want my opinion, my life is complex but I wouldn't change any of it. I love Rebecca and Trina. All right dude, take care."
And then he walked off to the elevator, waving over his shoulder. He was right. I'd been in denial about this. He didn't say it but I made things worse by ignoring it. No wonder she ran away. She probably thought I'd finally start hanging out with her again and that she screwed everything up. I always assume that she can read me better than other people, but you know what they say about assumptions.
I fucked it up so it was my job to unfuck it.
---
Crossing the Line
---
I drove home. It was a Saturday, and I knew Mom and Dad were volunteering all day so I had a window of opportunity to speak with Jamie without interruption. I was going to take it.
I stopped trying to be the laid back guy. I stopped hiding my feelings, my emotions. I let my love show in my eyes. I let the nervousness which seemed to be infecting every part of me display itself in my expression. I took a deep breath, knocked and entered her room without waiting. I closed it behind me and then went and sat on her bed.
Jamie spun around from her desk where she'd been messing with her laptop. Her face showed surprise, then irritation that I'd just come in without permission, then finally a mix of concern and worry as she saw how I was sitting. I had trouble meeting her eyes, which was again, not normal for me. She came over and sat next to me on her bed without having to be asked.
She sat facing me with one leg tucked under her and the other dangling off of the bed. Her body language was nervous but opened to me, vulnerable. Now that Irwin had pointed these things out to me it was impossible for me to miss them. God, she was so beautiful. I sat cross-legged and turned to face her. I needed her to understand that she was the sole focus of my attention. I hesitated and she broke the silence.
"Wha...what's wrong?" she asked softly and hesitantly, "Is this about last night?". I could tell that she feared my response. Feared that I would go back to ignoring her or just tell her that she was a deviant.
"Hey. This is going to be kind of hard for me to do, but I need you to understand that I don't think badly of you at all, ok? And that no matter what you say or how you react I'll be your big brother and you'll always be Tiny. Ok?"
She looked confused but a little relieved and nodded, expectantly.
"Please close your eyes. I know that sounds weird, but I'm really nervous and I think it would help."
She actually looked shocked that I admitted to being nervous. Well, that's good I guess. She should see that her brother isn't perfect, but a mess of insecurities from time to time. Still, she closed her eyes and waited.
I didn't want to make her wait, but I hesitated. Despite the what happened on our "date" last night, after I admitted this, she might not want to see or talk to me. I took in her high cheekbones. I took in her lush lips and the way her hair looked like golden thread, even when in a simple ponytail. I couldn't help but notice the way her body made even an old hoodie and boy's cargo shorts as appealing to me as lingerie. When I had looked enough, I started to tell her the truth.
"I love being with you. I love hearing your thoughts and your dumb jokes. I love when you explain very complex things to me in a way that I can understand without making me feel bad about myself. I love protecting you, whether it's from some dick at school or a nightmare. I love listening to you when you're sad or when you're so excited by some nerdy shit that you absolutely have to tell someone and that someone is me."
I could see that my honestly was having the desired effect. She had started to relax a little and smile. Even blush. God the way she blushed just made me want to kiss her.
"I love the way you look in the light of the afternoon in autumn when the sun reflects from your hair. I love how you smile when I come into a room, like its just for me. I...I love the way your ass looks in an old pair of jeans and how your breasts look in a tank top. And now I know that I love the way you kiss."
Her lips were parted slightly now and she was breathing fast and shallow.
"I love you. Not as a brother, but as a man. You'll always be my sister, Jamie, but I want you to be more. So much more."
And I took off her glasses slowly and gently, and kissed her. It was the best kissing I'd ever done. Slow and controlled, escalated to fiercely passionate. No hands this time, just mouths and tongues dancing. We stopped to breathe and she pushed me away, her eyes open again. She looked like she was holding back tears and my stomach dropped. Well, whatever she asked me to do I would do. Even if it meant leaving. I knew what unselfish love was now because I was willing to do the thing that I feared most for her.
"Wait," she said softly, "please. I love you, ok? I love you and I want this so much but...but I can't do it unless I'm clear on some things. Completely. This is something that's tearing me up. Ok?"
I nodded and waited. Well, whatever it was it wasn't as bad as I feared.
"Do...do you really want this to be romantic with me? Because I can't do just sex. I've...oh god I've fantasized about this conversation even. I want you to be my first, so badly. But if I do then I'm really yours, ok? Like I don't...I don't even know if I could ever be with anyone else. And...and I understand that you might need...need to sleep with other women, and...and...I can accept that, I think. But I have to be the only one you really love, ok?"
God. How was she this perfect? This devoted to someone like me. I didn't understand it. But I wasn't going to let this be one-sided. Now that I understood myself, I could understand her better too.
"No," I said without thinking, watching her face drop, "Wait! I mean 'no' as in 'no other women'. They've all just been stand-ins for you. I could never bond with any of them because I already felt something so deep for you. I understand now. I'm already yours, completely and exclusively. I couldn't ever stand watching another man with you. It would kill me inside. So I could never do that to you, either. I don't know how things will go. Maybe you'll get sick of me someday. But for me, you're the only woman I love and the only one I need."
She was openly crying now, but they were tears of relief. Of joy. She'd been worried this whole time that I was going to come to her and tell her that I could never return her feelings. That I loved her only as a sister.
"Ok," she said very softly so I had to lean in to even hear her, "And I want the first time to be inside me completely. No condoms. Just us, together. Like...oh god like a wedding night. Later...we can do whatever you want. This is my last condition, I swear."
I nodded agreement. I was all too aware of my painfully hard cock. I needed to be out of these pants and inside of her.
"Undress me," she said, "like I've wanted you to since you saved me all those years ago."
My cock told me to tear her clothes off. Maybe that would be fine later, but tonight needed to be special. I wanted her to remember this forever.
I moved closer to her, gently putting my hand on the side of her face and kissing her softly, showing my intent. Then I put my hands under her hoodie and slowly removed it. She raised her hands compliantly, making it easy. She wore no bra today. Oh god. She was more beautiful then I had fantasized. It occurred to me that Tiny might no longer be an appropriate nickname. I only let myself be dazed for a moment. I unbuttoned her cargo shorts and unzipped them slowly, looking her in the eye as I did so. She leaned back onto her hands so I could more easily remove them and her panties. I could tell that this simple ritual made her feel both loved and desired. We would repeat it often, especially when we reunited after being apart for a long time. After I was done removing her panties, I sat back and took her in.
She bit her lip, tense, as she pulled the scrunchie off of her ponytail and let her hair cascade naturally down her back. Her breasts were better than I had imagined they would be. Unsupported, they sagged slightly under their own weight but were clearly firm. Her nipples were just on the large side of medium, and hard. Her soft pink blush of excitement extended over her thighs and the top of her chest. She sat with one hand supporting her and her legs tucked under her. Because of this, I couldn't see her sex but I could see her beautiful thatch of golden hair above it. The way she was posed combined with her pale skin made her look like she was a sculpture of a goddess at rest.
"Wow," was all I could get out. She smiled, only slightly nervous now. She was clearly both proud and pleased to be the subject of her brother's lust. It would not be incorrect to say that I had seen many naked women up close. My sister's nude body was, objectively, the most beautiful I had ever experienced. For the first time in years, I was worried about being able to make a woman cum before I did.
While I was hesitating, Jamie reached forward and began to undress me the same way. Her hands were shaking slightly and I reminded myself that all of this was new for her. I'd have to do this slow and gentle despite wanting to take her fast and hard. After she took my shirt off she started to gently move her hands over my stomach, chest, back. She looked at me as if for permission and when I nodded, wanting her to act freely, she began to kiss me on my chest. I'd never been with a girl who was at once so innocent and also so sensual. I was shocked to realize that this simple action was turning me on almost as much as if she had my cock in her mouth. I had placed my hand in her hair without even realizing it and after a little bit she stopped and looked up at me with a small smile on her face.
"Did that feel good?" she asked, hopefully.
"Yes," I answered, my voice shaky, "god, yes."
"Good," she said, starting to unbuckle my belt and unbuttoning my pants. Her hands were stable this time, but she was rushing now in her eagerness. I could see her need in her eyes, and realized what she desperately wanted to see. I waited until she unzipped my fly and then I grabbed her wrist gently, stopping her from reaching into my pants.
Immediately she looked up at me, upset. Her mouth had such a pout to it that it was almost comical. I smirked at her in the way all older brothers do when they are denying something to their little sisters.
"Ask for it," I said, firmly.
"But...but I..." she started. I shook my head.
"Ask for it. Be specific. I want to hear your sweet mouth say the words."
At this, she smiled, understanding that she had an effect on me that she had never suspected. It pushed her past her natural demureness. She looked up at me, her eyes wide, her voice almost little-girl in its sweetness.
"Big brother, can I take your cock out and play with it? Pleeeasssse?"
She drew out the last word in a way that made shivers run down my spine. I nodded, she smiled wide, reached in, and released my cock from its prison. Her small hand felt so right gripping it, and it seemed like she was doing so exactly the way I liked, firm but not rough. She stopped doing anything I and I looked at her. Her face had a little 'O' of surprise on it, and she licked her lips without thinking about it. It was one of the most erotic things I'd ever seen. Anticipation and fear warred in her eyes.
"I...I think it might be a little too big to fit..." she said, hesitantly.
I actually laughed at that, and she looked up angrily and hit me on my arm.
"Jerk! I'm being serious! What...what if I'm too small? I want you really badly..." she looked so sad for a moment I worried that she would cry. I immediately felt bad for my spontaneous outburst of laughter.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I forget sometimes that not everyone is as experienced as I am. It isn't that big, about average as far as I can tell. And you can stretch to accept it. But I won't hurt you, ok? If its too much or we can't tonight then that's ok. We can go slowly and...get you adapted...in other ways. Don't worry about anything."
She nodded, relieved. I lay down and pulled my pants off the rest of the way. As I did so she couldn't take her eyes off my cock. I knew that this must have been the first one that she had seen in person. I motioned for her to lay down next to me. She did so, cuddling up next to me, her head on my chest. Her breasts felt amazing pressed against my side. I put my arm around her protectively, instinctively.
"Let's just start slow, ok? This will just go where it goes. I'm not going to be upset if we have to stop," I hesitated for a moment, not out of resistance, but because I never really thought I'd utter the next words out loud, "You're my one and only girl, now. You're worth being patient for."
There were tears in her eyes as she nodded. I took her small hand and put it back on my cock. I put mine on her pussy, and gently began to move, exploring her labia and very gently brushing her clitoris. She moaned, very loudly. She gasped and covered her mouth with her free hand. I looked at her and we suddenly both burst out into laughter. After a few seconds, we were smiling at each other again, a little more relaxed. I began moving my hand again and she whimpered. She did her best to stroke me too but she had a lot of trouble focusing.
I realized that as turned on as I was, her need was greater. I had barely started and already she was grinding against my hand, her eyes closed. I watched her face as I slipped a single finger inside her warm, wet, tightness. In ecstasy, she was even more beautiful. She writhed under my touch now, grinding against my palm and moaning. I could barely hear her but she was saying my name, softly, over and over. Her hand moved over my cock, slowly. I'd show her how I liked to be touched later. Tonight was more about her than me.
Her moans intensified, her words stopped. She could no longer move her hand on my cock and she cuddled her head into me, eyes screwed shut tightly. Suddenly, her whole body tensed against mine, then she bucked against my hand and shook all over.
"Oh...oh god. I love you, big brother," she said as she fell limp against me, "It's so...so different when you do it, so much better than alone."
While she recovered I began to pull away from her. She reached out and held my arm, almost panicked.
"I'm not leaving, Jamie, I'm just starting round two," I winked at her, smiling impishly as I started to kiss her breasts while fondling them and caressing her nipples.
"Oh...oh fuck, no one else has ever touched them before...feels so good"
But they were just a pit stop on the way down. I kept fondling them as I kissed my way down her soft, smooth belly. She whimpered and put her hands in my hair. I could tell that she knew what I was starting to do and she tensed up a little. I knew that there were a few reasons why she might be hesitant about having me go down on her. I wanted to stop and reassure her, but I had caught her scent as she had become more aroused. I had to taste her. The need was overwhelming.
I reached the spot where the golden thatch of her pussy started. She had never trimmed it, which didn't surprise me, but it was clean and soft, darker than the hair on her head. Her scent was so intense here, it overwhelmed me. It wasn't unclean or unpleasant, at all. I couldn't wait any longer and began to lick and kiss at her labia. She tasted better than the finest wine, the purest water. It was musky and savory and stronger than I expected. I would never forget either her smell or taste. Was I more sensitive to it because she was closely related to me? I realized that in the future I'd probably be able to smell her arousal even if I were on the other side of a room.
I had paused and my virginal lover had become impatient. Her hands had eagerly begun to pull my head up, desperate for me to taste her most sensitive spot. I obeyed but did so slowly, teasingly. My tongue darted around her clitoris, just barely touching it. Again I slipped a finger inside of her. She was still so tight. A part of me wanted to stop with the foreplay and simply thrust myself inside her, taking her and making her mine. I knew that she wouldn't have stopped me, but that wasn't how her first time should go. I barely controlled myself.
I gradually increased the sensation on her clitoris as I began to move my finger insider rhythmically. I added a second finger and hooked them to touch her g-spot. She jerked as if shocked by electricity. As I heard her breathing and whimpering increase in tempo, I sucked her clit completely into her mouth and stimulated her g-spot intensely. She ground her pussy against my face as her back arched and she moaned almost into a shout. She collapsed again, breathing harder than I'd ever heard. I decided to give her some time to recover.
"Oh, god...brother...fuck...its not like I thought. I love you so much."
I held her as she spoke. Just to reassure her that this wasn't just me making her feel good, but her brother showing his love for her. I wanted her to know beyond a doubt that when we were done I would still be there for her. No matter what. I regretted that I had been sleeping around for so long, if only because I never wanted her to think that she was just a distraction or a "fun time" for me.
"I want you in my mouth now. I need to taste you and make you feel good."
She looked at me and I knew that I could never deny her anything.
"Ok, but only for a little while. I don't have a lot of willpower left. It's difficult when your lover is so beautiful."
She smiled at my obvious flattery and knelt beside me, her mouth hovering over my cock.
"So, um, do I just put it in my mouth and try to get it as deep as possible? Like in my throat? Should I use my tongue? I...I want it to be good for you."
"Don't worry about taking me deep tonight. I'd love for you to do that later, but it probably would be too much for both of us right now. Just do what feels natural for tonight, don't use your teeth. We can have a more educational session later."
I was so proud of her, eager and ready to try and please me. She was even ready to try deep-throating me right away. She took a deep breath and put me in her mouth. Slowly, agonizingly slowly she moved her mouth up and down, her tongue roaming over every part of my shaft, my tip. She must have tasted my pre-cum, I knew that I was dripping pretty badly by then. She moaned a little and I realized that this must have been turning her on as well; she was touching herself now. I wish I could see that better. I could finally admit that in quiet moments of the dead of night I wondered what she looked like when she masturbated.
"Ok, god, stop. I don't want to cum yet and you're getting a little too good at this..."
It was my turn to gasp and pant as she let me out of her mouth, and licked me one more time from base to tip. She was smiling widely, happy that she had done a good job. I smiled back down at her, hoping that it conveyed the depth of my love as well as simple pleasure.
"Lay down on your back now, baby. Its time. I need you," I spoke quietly but firmly, taking charge. I think she liked that. She obeyed fast and eagerly. As soon as she was laying back she spread her legs as far as they would go. She still looked a little afraid. I also realized that she didn't look that comfortable so I grabbed a pillow and tucked it behind her head.
"Better?"
She smiled and nodded. I moved over her carefully, letting only part of my weight settle on her. I knew that she wasn't fragile but the need to protect her was almost as overwhelming as my urge to fuck her. I placed myself at the entrance of her sex, the head of my cock pressing into her slit ever so slightly.
"Oh...oh fuck," she gasped, her hands gripping me, "I...need that inside me..."
She moved her hand down and spread her lips for me. She was as open as she could be. I pushed gently and firmly. There was only a little resistance. She bit her lip very briefly, and then I was sliding inside of her more freely. She was so unbelievably tight on my cock. I was for the first time worried about whether I would entirely fit. Even knowing that was ridiculous from an anatomy perspective, I was being gripped along the entire length of my shaft. She didn't look to be in pain though.
"Yes...all of it. Please give me your cock, big brother. I've been so good for you, haven't I? I've been a good little sister. I teased you all through the date last night. Part of me wanted it to be like this but part of me wanted you to get frustrated with me and just bend me over the hood of your car. To be treated like just a hole to fuck."
Hearing those words from my little sister's mouth was was so unexpectedly erotic that I had to calm my breathing for a second. It wouldn't do to cum before I even took a stroke inside her, although chances are she would have regarded that as a point of pride. As she spoke she had wrapped her legs around me and was pulling me in faster. I resisted on purpose, teasing her a bit.
"Puhlleeeeassssseeeee..." was all she could get out.
I let myself go the rest of the way inside her, bottoming out. I'd never felt that right being inside a woman before, but I'd never been with someone that I loved. I leaned in and kissed her, she kissed me back passionately. I started to move. Slowly, shallowly at first. Just short strokes, gentle but quick. She whimpered every time I pushed back inside her. I'd never been with a more responsive lover. I sped up, lengthened my strokes.
"Fuck...oh fuck...yes...fuck your little sister...harder..."
I couldn't ignore a request from a lady, could I? It would be ungentlmanly. I had run out of willpower in any case. I began to increase the intensity of my strokes until I was afraid I might bruise her. To my surprise, she pushed back, every stroke, as well as bucking and grinding her hips against me. Her breath was ragged and I realized that she was about to cum on my cock. She must have been at least as turned on as I was last night, if not more.
She wrapped her arms around my neck and looked into my eyes, her whimpers increased to moans and steadily grew louder. Her cunt began to spasm around my cock, almost painfully tightly. All the while she continued to push back against my hard thrusts. It was too much for both of us. Her body tensed and she shuddered, the volume of her moans became loud enough that they could have been heard outdoors. As she peaked, I started to cum. I knew that I was cumming far more than I normally would. She milked every drop out of me.
She made a satisfied noise and I went limp. She started laughing as my chest fell on her.
"Oh god, you're crushing me..."
"Sorry," I said, rolling off of her. She smoothly rolled with me until her head was resting on my chest. She looked even more beautiful with the flush of an orgasm on her and her body glistening with sweat. She smiling with the look of a well-fucked woman. She clung to me tightly, as if she was afraid that I would go.
"That's it, then. You're mine and I'm yours. No other girls for me."
I decided that reassurance was the way to go. Now that we were both more relaxed I wanted her feel secure in my arms and in our relationship.
"Mmm. Yep. I guess you just needed your little sister's pussy to settle you down a little," she said mischievously. She only lets her dirty side show when she's alone with me. She's kind of a gift that keeps on giving, honestly. I wish I had been man enough to acknowledge my feelings sooner.
So things are complicated at my house. We're young, horny, and in love. Its hard to find a place where we can be alone and Jamie has extreme difficulty being quiet when she gets excited. Sometimes I cover her mouth but I honestly love hearing her cry out. We've taken some "camping trips" together that basically amounts to screwing in the woods and being able to be openly affectionate with each other. When she graduates I suspect we'll end up in an apartment together, "to save money". I was worried for a while that she'd get tired of me, or that I'd do something dumb to ruin things. But I haven't been tempted to even look in another girl's direction, and for some reason, she still thinks of me as her hero. I don't regret any of it.
And none of it would have happened without that tackle.The Tackle Pt. 02 - Consequences
Events and revelations threaten a brother and sister's love.
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Author's Note
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I'm deeply grateful to all of you who read "The Tackle". If you haven't, you may want to prior to reading this. On the subject, I received some truly excellent feedback and criticism specifically about character flaws and obstacles, as well as some very wise advice from the extremely talented writer Anomic, for which I am extremely grateful.
If you've read my other stuff, you probably know that I do love my drama. You've been warned.
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Possible Futures - Mike
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Two Years Later
"What, exactly, do you mean by 'Maybe we should slow down,' Michael?"
God, she was beautiful. Even when she was clearly both exasperated with me and uncertain about my intentions. She generally only called me Michael when she was very upset with me. It was like an early warning system. I'd have to be careful.
"I mean, we nearly got caught last night. You were loud and I was, well, far too involved in how good your pussy felt to even consider the world outside of the living room. We were stupid and god only knows what would have happened if you hadn't heard the garage door opening."
We were even luckier than that. Dad didn't park in the garage a lot, because it was his informal art studio. If they had just parked out front and used the main door, they would have seen their children bonding in ways that they would not have approved of.
She looked like she was about to cry. Oh, fuck.
"Yeah? Well, to me it sounds more like you're a little tired of the same pussy. You'd never even have worried about this when we first got together. And...and maybe it would be good if someone caught us. It would force you to either move somewhere with me...or tell me that you didn't want to."
"Is that what this is about? I'm not hesitating. I'm months away from graduating, then I can get a job anywhere, and start my masters. And you can transfer to any school you want. We can both go far away and live the way we want to. We talked about this. Agreed to it. We were both excited about it. What changed?"
"Nothing," she said, but she didn't believe it, "I just...you were so upset and I don't understand why. Bad things could have happened but they didn't. And you've been cold lately. Don't tell me you haven't! You've pulled away from me when I try to hug you. You've avoided me when I've been...very, you know, welcoming. And you keep getting texts at all hours"
"Well, I can't help the texts. There are just some people who won't let go. And I never meant to be cold, but you're right. You're right, and I'm sorry. I...I keep seeing what would happen if we were caught. How you would be treated. How your future could be impacted. Would we survive that? I don't know, but I know mom and dad would be devestated. Can you imagine that?"
Oh god, now she was crying. Fuck. I am not very good at this long-term relationship thing. And the truth was, I already did have a plan if we were caught. I always told her not to say anything and let me do the talking, and being the trusting little sister she was, she agreed. I would confess to taking advantage of her, using her trust of me to manipulate her into a sexual relationship, and we'd see where things landed. She'd deny it, which would just make people think that I'd really done a number on her. Victims are treated differently than co-conspirators, even if there is no crime. I would do anything to keep the stigma of being my willing incestuous lover from my sister's name. I might go to jail and I certainly would be out of the family. But she wouldn't be.
Not that she'd ever agree to that plan, which is why I never told her that part. But I didn't want that. I truly and really did want to move away with her, like we discussed. Well, mostly. The big difference between the two of us was life experience. I worried, a lot to be honest, about whether something this serious was good for her. Could I truly be said to be thinking like a good big brother while I was bending her over the kitchen table on the regular?
I had broached the topic of her dating other people. I would wait for her, maybe date but keep everything light and non-sexual if she wanted. I had been kind of a slut for years, and that just seemed fair to me. It would be...well it would be hell, even imagining Jamie with someone else made my heart ache, but I had to put it out there. This wasn't a normal relationship and we were making up the rules as we went.
For some reason that I sincerely cannot understand, she interpreted this as a flimsy excuse. A smokescreen I was using to cover a cowardly exit from our relationship. Didn't she understand that even bringing it up made me nauseous? Things hadn't always been like this. In fact, they really didn't get bad until the last month.
She'd gotten more clingy (although certainly nothing beyond what would be considered normal in a traditional relationship) and even hornier. She'd also been more reckless than I'd ever seen her, and it worried me. If I refused her or deflected her advances, even if only until later in the day, she became silent and depressed. It was like I was the analytical and logical partner and she was thinking with her emotions and genetalia. I wasn't comfortable with this switch in roles and I had no explanation for it.
"I'm sorry. It just seems like every day we move further apart and no closer to getting out on our own. Just promise that you aren't leaving me behind. I just...I just need to hear it from you."
I hugged her and held her close.
"Tiny, I'd honestly rather be hit by a car than leave you. I'm not going anywhere. It was your plan to take our time and be careful until I graduated, remember? I was the one who wanted to rush off and get a crappy local apartment so I could do more unspeakable things to you in privacy. Your way just makes more sense for our future together. We'd only have to pretend when we came home to visit mom and dad, or when friends visited us. I really can't wait. I just want you to be sure that this isn't too early for you."
She smiled a little. Thank god. I could see her fidgeting with the string on my hoodie as I pressed her to my chest.
"I know. Its just getting...really hard. My brain keeps making up these...horrible scenarios where we fight and then you go back to lots of girls and I'm just...just me. Alone. I'm sorry I said what I did."
And like previous storms, this one was over just as fast. I was certain that she loved me, but at this point I felt like everything else was up in the air, or at least resting on a very shaky foundation. I wasn't sleeping well, I was having trouble dodging questions from my friends and family about my love life, and the combination of work and school was wearing pretty heavily on me.
"Things have been tough on both of us. Honestly, it's only the thought of you that gets me through some days. Just give it time, and trust me."
She nodded and cuddled more into my chest. I knew her well enough to know that my smell and the softness of the old hoodie I was wearing were both very reassuring for her. I hugged her because that was all I knew to do.
Everything would be fine. It had to be.
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Interested Parties - Mike
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Jamie glanced at the clock.
"Oh shit, its three! I need to change!"
It was, in fact, my 24th birthday. I'd invited my close friends and Jamie had done the same. Well, honestly, her friends had subtly also become my friends. I didn't really mind though. I think she was looking forward to the party more than I was. It was an excuse to get together and talk about nerdy shit, which she was always up for and I found extremely endearing.
We had persuaded mom and dad to take a weekend getaway, telling them that we'd like to have a party and we weren't sure how late it might go. Our parties were pretty laid back and the worst we got up to was smoking weed. As long as we stayed out of mom's stash, they were fine with us and our friends. It would, not coincidentally, give Jamie and me some badly needed time together. I wanted her, almost as badly as I had before our first time together. Our last attempt had been interrupted by our parent's early return, and before that we hadn't had sex in two weeks.
I understand how that must sound, but for us it was a lifetime, even with late night mutual masturbation or cunnilingus. We were in love, and having my cock deep inside her as often as possible seemed to be as vital to both of us as breathing.
Unsurprisingly, Ellie and Julian showed up first. They tended to think we needed help with this sort of thing and they liked to come early in case there were any last minute tasks. They were right, of course. Our argument had lasted longer than either of us had planned, so we hadn't completed a few of things.
"Could you guys cut the little things into smaller things? We really need to put the stuff in them and get them into the oven."
She was talking about cutting some crescent roll dough from a can and filling it with some chorizo and then baking them into delicious little spicy savory meat rolls. Jamie could communicate like that, and her friends almost magically knew what she was talking about. Hell, I did too. It was another thing about her that I found adorable.
She noticed me looking at her as she finished frosting some cupcakes and she shot me a sexy little smirk. That was another new thing. It seemed like she was teaching herself how to tease me. Probably there was a subreddit she frequented and some spreadsheets with lists of behaviors and results noted.
I'm not complaining and I wouldn't change any of it for the world. Sometimes I wonder if mom and dad would accept that we were lovers simply because we understood and just accepted each other in ways that only family could. It was wishful thinking.
She was dressed rather casually. Or at least that's how others would see it. She wore a long-sleeved white sweater, just tight enough to show her curves but not enough to make out any detail of her fantastic breasts. Her knee-length skirt was a deep blue, and no-one could call it immodest. It was made of light material that hung off her hips just so, loose enough to rise and fall as she walked, tight enough to just slightly restrict her movement. She wore it for me, I knew. Partially because her preferred casual wear was simple pants and sweatshirts, but partially because of what she was doing.
She was finding a lot of excuses to bend over, and each time she did, the dress rode up a little higher. She wasn't looking in my direction, but she was making sure that it stayed that way...until the next time. Finally, the skirt lifted up to show just the bottom of her lovely, upside-down heart shaped ass. Her skin was pale almost to the point of translucence and I knew from first hand experience how it felt firm but yielding in my hand. The chorizo wasn't the only thing that was spicy. Her panties were clearly new as I hadn't seen them before. They were black and lacy, barely big enough to be called clothing. I was transfixed. She'd never really wore sexy underwear, not like this. She was stepping out of her comfort zone, for me. And holy shit was it hot.
"Uh, wow," Julian said. Being the only man I knew who was possibly more of a horn-dog than I was, he would be the one to notice. Thankfully his entire attention was diverted by the vision of loveliness that was my sister's ass so he didn't see me looking. God that was a sentence I never thought I'd write. Ellie hit him on the shoulder.
"Jamie, you're giving this pervert a show," she said, being a solid friend, as always. I liked her.
"Ow, I was going to say something," Julian said, defensively, "In a minute. Or two."
Jamie fixed her dress, but didn't appear to be bothered that someone other than me noticed her shapely bottom.
"It's no big deal. Its just you guys, and my brother," she said, smiling innocently.
"Don't encourage Julian. He's got enough plates in the air," Ellie said.
Ellie was probably right. Julian typically was dating between one and three people at any given time. He was the cute artist type so he could get away with it. Ellie, however, was a different story. She had deep olive skin and curves for days with well-proportioned very natural looking large breasts and ass. Some may have considered her to be overweight, but nearly all of the men I knew just called her sexy. She was confident with her body, not to mention smart and, like my sister, pretty nerdy. She'd been engaging in an endless war of teasing with Julian. He knew she would go out with him, but it would have to be exclusive. He wasn't ready to give up the endless stream of college girls. I couldn't blame him, but Ellie would absolutely have been someone that I would have pursued in the time before I acknowledged my feelings for Jamie.
I might look at Ellie, but what I felt for my sister meant that I was never tempted to stray.
She was working with Ellie and Julian, directing in the kitchen, moving things around, putting snacks on plates just so. Normally I would be right in there, doing whatever it was she felt most important. Today, I was prohibited from doing so on the grounds that it was my birthday. She had arranged everything for this party on her own, and had hinted at more when we were alone tomorrow. Our parents didn't get home until Monday, and I was very much looking forward to whatever her vivid imagination had come up with. For a second I had a vision of her as a mother, maybe ten years older, managing a kitchen of laughing and running children. I realized that it was possible for me to love her more than I did, a prospect I found almost frightening. Knocking at the door disrupted my thoughts.
"I'll get it," I said, striding to answer it.
It was Stevie and Greg, who were still going strong, thankfully.
"I'm sorry, we had to park you in. Some jackass parked their silver Nissan on the curb so badly that there's no room for any other cars," Greg said, rolling his eyes.
"No worries, we're not going anywhere until tomorrow," I said, thinking hopefully about what might happen later tonight, after our guests left.
A few minutes later the rest of our short guest list arrived: Irwin, Trina, and Rebecca (who seemed to show up everywhere together anymore). I had invited a few other friends but, unsurprisingly, they had prior plans to fly to Vegas to drink and womanize for the weekend. It was the sort of thing I used to enjoy, so I didn't hold it against them. We'd hit the bar together when they got back.
Time passed. We drank and ate unhealthy snacks. Irwin told stupid jokes. We hung out in the living room. Later we'd play Cards Against Humanity. I could see how some people would see this as boring, but honestly it was everything I wanted.
A buzzer went off in the kitchen, indicating that something delicious was done. Jamie started to stand up but I waved her down.
"You can sit for a while, I haven't done anything. I'll plate the food and bring it out. Anyone need anything while I'm up. Beer?"
Jamie shook her head but Irwin and Trina waved empty bottles at me. I took them and went to the kitchen.
"I'll help," a familiar voice say behind me. And that's how Ellie got me alone, in the kitchen. I don't know how I missed her obvious intentions.
While I eased the food out and set it on the stove top to cool, Ellie got beer for Irwin and Trina, which was nice of her. What I didn't expect was how close she was standing behind me when I turned around. It was actually a little spooky how quietly she had moved. Like a panther stalking its prey. She had a knowing little smirk on her face as she moved even closer.
"I've been doing a lot of thinking lately," she said ominously.
"Oh?" I said, trying to hide my anxieties by quickly swigging my beer. My history of promiscuity was, yet again, coming back to haunt me.
"I've been wondering why it is, that no matter many signals I put out or times I flirt with you, you've never just taken me back to your room, bent me over, and given me the good hard fucking that I deserve," she said, stepping so close that her nipples, which I could now see very clearly through her tight black shirt, were maybe an inch from my chest.
I barely avoided spitting my beer out on her. Jesus Christ where was this girl three years ago? Probably underage, I reminded myself.
"I, uh, kind of gave up the player life," I said lamely, "it wasn't really satisfying any more."
"Hmm," she said, thoughtfully, her voice low and husky, "I figured as much. But...you know it wouldn't just have to be sex if we were together. It could be more. If that's what you wanted."
Fuck, I was getting an erection despite myself. I slid desperately around her, snagging the snacks and moving back towards the living room.
"I...I'm just a little weird about being romantic with my sister's friends." I doubted that she bought it but it was the best I could come up with being as flustered as I was.
"Mike," she said, calling to me back from the kitchen. Thankfully she didn't seem upset by my rejection, but she didn't seem to have given up, either.
"Yes," I said over my shoulder, stopping briefly.
"I'm going to find out who your secret lover is. It's the only explanation for why you haven't fucked me or any of the other girls I've noticed throwing themselves at you. I don't know why you've kept her from us, but you must have your reasons. I'm going to find out who she is and tell her that she has competition. I'm very good at finding things out, you know."
I made a noncommittal noise and moved back into the living room. She was a journalism major and was, in fact, very good at investigation. God, thats just what I needed, Ellie watching me like a hawk. Jamie gave me a raised eyebrow when I came back into the room. I just shrugged helplessly. The irony was that if I could just tell her that I was with her best friend, she'd back off, immediately. She wouldn't ever betray Jamie. Neither would I.
Thankfully, aside from some intense gazing, Ellie didn't press the issue any more that night. It was, on the whole, a fun and successful event, and relaxing. Jamie even managed to usher everyone out fairly early talking about how tired I had been. It helped that the weather was turning nasty and we could hear thunder in the distance. I was tired, but I wasn't going to sleep until I'd had want I really wanted for my birthday. What I desperately needed.
Jamie had just finished showing Rebecca out. As soon as she had turned around I was on her, pushing her small body against the closed door. I wasn't rough, but I was firm. She whimpered a little, in anticipation. I pressed my body up against hers, feeling her softness yield to me, her nipples already hard like pebbles. She was so much smaller than me, it made me want to protect her. It made me want to take her. I stroked her hair how she liked and leaned in and kissed her. She responded with her whole body, the way no other girl did.
She wrapped her arms around my neck, pulling me closer and then raised her leg and hooked it around mine, grinding against me. I was so hard that I hurt. My need to get laid was overwhelmed by my need to be with her. We spent so much time pretending, so much time concealing. We we let ourselves come out, we were barely in control.
I reached down, pulling her skirt up, putting my hands on her bare legs. God they were so smooth and soft. I didn't care if she ever shaved but when she knew we would be together she always did. Once she knew that something that she did turned me on, she never forgot. I lifted her up and she wrapped her legs completely around my waist. She was so light, so perfect. I tried to focus on walking up the stairs but she kept licking and kissing me on my neck. I made it up and took her to my room. To my bed.
I set her down softly. Normally I could be aggressive and she was game, but for whatever reason slow and gentle seemed right for tonight. She took off her sweater slowly, letting her full breasts pop out in that perfect sexy way. They seemed a little larger to me recently, but no less firm. She unbuttoned her skirt and slid it off, taking care to maintain eye contact. The little tease. She leaned back on her arms and had her legs pressed together chastely. She wasn't fooling anyone. All she had on were the tiny black panties that she'd flashed me earlier in the day.
"Did you get these for my birthday?"
She answered by smiling her sinful little smile. The one she saved only for me. At first she had been very innocent. Before we became lovers she had barely even watched any porn, and even that she had regarded as "research" for how to please men. Well, how to please me, specifically. Which was flattering, but it took a while to get her to just be natural, to let herself go and enjoy herself. She was up for nearly anything I wanted to try, and for her part always wanted to engage in new, uh, roleplaying scenarios. Complete with outfits. Those nights were always fun.
I took off my clothes, faster and clumsier than she did. I went to the bed to unwrap my best present. I slowly pulled off her panties, revealing a small, neat landing strip of blonde hair. That was new. She usually kept it natural, which was fine with me, but I guess she was still full of surprises. The soft and musky scent of her sex intoxicated me, and I could see that she was already very wet. God she must have needed me at least as much as I needed her.
She spread her legs for me, inviting me in a way she know I could not refuse. God I loved seeing her when she was ready for me. I couldn't wait any longer. I moved over her, putting the head of my cock right at the folds of her entrance. She gasped and bit her lip, ready. I couldn't resist waiting for a moment and teasing her.
"Please," she said in her small voice, the one she knew I could never resist. Her eyes were big and needy, the way I liked them. Even now she was still very much my little sister, trying to get her big brother to be with her. I entered her, slowly, carefully. For whatever reason the natural protectiveness I felt for her was very strong that night. It could have been all of the effort that she had put into making this weekend special. It could have been a reaction to how emotionally fragile she'd been lately. It could have been that even in my distracted state I knew something had changed.
She inhaled sharply as I filled her then moaned deeply as took a long, slow stroke. We were alone and she could be as loud as she wanted to be. She did't talk much during sex any more, but it wasn't a bad thing. She said everything she needed to with her body. She briefly held my head with her hands so she could show me her small, loving smile, and lock eyes with me, before my steady and deep fucking made her lose focus in a series of gasps and whimpers.
Her legs locked around mine, her left hand gripped my hair and pulled me closer as her right reached behind her and gripped the low headboard for leverage. With every full stroke she pushed back, rolling her hips and grinding her clit against me. I wasn't the biggest man, but I knew I had to be careful sometimes as she was so petite compared to me that I was in danger of hitting her cervix, which hurt her. She loved being filled completely, however. So tonight I went long and deep for her.
"Fuck, baby, your cunt is so perfect. How is it still the best after all this time? Yours is the only one I think about any more."
"God...talking like that...is going to make me...oh...oh..."
As her first orgasm hit her by surprise, I felt her back arch a bit and her hands wrapped around my back in a desperate attempt to bring me closer. Every act of intimacy with her seemed to pull us closer. We were like objects in space, sometimes wonderfully together, other times frustratingly and torturously separated, only able to look and pretend. This was starting to wear on me. It didn't make me love her any less, but it did depress me when all I wanted was the ability to fuck my girl and take her on regular dates where we wouldn't have to worry about shame or judgement.
My pace increased as I began to use shorter, faster strokes inside her wet pussy. This wasn't for her benefit, but because I was running out of self-control. She had begun to clutch and squeeze at my cock with her vaginal muscles. It made me grunt every time, which in turn raised her arousal. We chained off each other, every touch, every stimulation amplified and returned, with interest.
"I love how you grip me baby"
As I felt her approaching her second orgasm, I pushed myself completely inside her and worked my hips against hers, giving her both the sensation of being filled and something to grind her swollen clitoris against. I supported myself with my left arm as my right grasped her breast and played with her nipples, always a sensitive place for her. I kissed her neck.
"Oh god. Like that. Please, please, please..."
Jamie came like a wave rolling over her, her whole body shuddering, her cunt spasming around my cock. She was mewling and whimpering now, very aroused. I loved making her feel like that. I wanted to give her a third one tonight, one that she liked to call "deep orgasms". She told me that it was like being swallowed by a wave and pulled down by the undertow, falling into darkness, completely unable to control her reactions.
I loved to give it to her because she needed to be with someone she trusted completely to have one. I would always do my best to be that person. I was still her big brother, even if I was inside her.
I started to move faster and a little harder, going back to long strokes. I saw her eyelids flutter and she stopped talking, only moaning and whimpering. Her head moved side to side and she bit her lip in concentration. It began to pull her under. As I felt her cunt grip me with incredible tightness, she arched her back, hard, pressing her self against me almost painfully. Her legs were around my waist now, pulling my cock as deeply as I could go, instinctively guiding me towards her hungry womb. I was over whelmed as I heard her cry out a scream of pleasure.
I came in incredibly powerful spurts, my cock aching with the force. I was buried so deep inside her that I knew that I had bathed her deepest places with my seed. I leaned into her wrapping my arms around her as I felt her orgasm completely release inside her and her arms and legs went limp. I rolled over.
I held her as she came down, pulling her tightly to my chest. I kissed her hair and caressed her as she liked. She would at times cum so intensely with me that we had a "cool off" ritual that we did. It was mostly cuddling and me saying soothing things to her, but she would stay agitated if we didn't do it.
"That's it, Tiny. That's my good girl. You did so well, cumming for me like that."
She whimpered and cuddled her head into my chest, which I knew as a good sign. She was comfortable, satiated, and safe in my arms. She said so much without speaking.
I'd never been with any woman who was so sensual in the moment, or who lost herself so completely in pleasure. It was intoxicating and it made my orgasms stronger, my need to fill her more urgent. I marveled at how I'd gone from multiple partners per week to finding it unimaginable to make love to anyone but Jamie.
The price of this intensity, for her, was vulnerability. She had difficulty with any loss of self-control, and only her near-complete trust of me allowed her to let go so completely. She said it was like falling into the most wonderful pleasure, with me to catch her at the end before she hurt herself. I know this probably sounds odd, but I think of it as a side effect of her brilliance. She thinks differently in nearly every way from me, even if we do agree on many things, so why not also with sex? If my parents hadn't been distrustful of doctors, I suspect that they would have an explanation for it.
I didn't really care. I loved her for how she was, no matter what word you used to describe it. Tonight I had cum inside her, like many times before, but it still felt like the very first time to me, even after two years. We'd sleep in the same bed, unworried about being found out or caught. I'd spoon her and she'd eagerly cuddle into me, asking me to wrap my arms tightly around her. She might even wake me up later by grinding her incredible ass against me, something that always led to her getting fucked.
I was so grateful for this moment. I couldn't imagine a future without Jamie beside me anymore. I slept well that night. Even with the future being uncertain, I knew that this was how I wanted to live, unashamed and with the woman I loved. Forever
-----------------------
Surprise Moves - Mike
-----------------------
Waking up in her arms without having to worry on anyone walking in on us was a wonderful gift on top of being able to make love the prior night. As I'd expected, she'd woken me up in the night by grinding her ass against my cock and I took her from behind, gently and lovingly. To me, it felt almost like we were married and celebrating our anniversary. Before I left for work I told her how wonderful the previous day was and how lucky I was. She smiled mysteriously.
"Oh, your birthday isn't over yet. Wait till you get home tonight..."
Well, that caught my interest. I would not be making any stops on the way home.
I took a shower and threw on some clothes. Shortly after kissing Tiny goodbye I was driving down the interstate, about five miles from the gym where I was working as a personal trainer. It kept me busier than I liked but the work was steady, never boring, and most importantly, paid well. Well enough to put the deposit down on one of the apartments that we were looking at in Pasadena. Even as expensive as they all were, we could find something big enough for both of us in a decent area and I could make enough to pay the rent.
As long as nothing changed in the next month or so, we should be fine. The key would be to stay on course, and do nothing that would alarm anyone. It would be odd for both of us to move to the same city, but at the same time it made perfect sense. I knew that there weren't a lot of jobs in my field here and I'd been talking for months about moving out west where I could find something more easily while continuing my education. Jamie was brilliant but didn't always do well among unfamiliar people. If she wanted to pursue some of her more intensive ambitions, she'd need to go to a school with a better name than the local state college. We'd broached the subject with our parents and they actually looked relieved that we were thinking of moving together, even if they would miss us. They knew that we would watch out for each other, although they were probably more worried about Jamie. I don't think they needed to be.
I got off at my exit, and stopped at the light, which was blinking yellow. I noticed that the signs and streetlights were all off, leaving the busy commercial street unnaturally dark. Was there a power outage from the storm last night? I saw the gym coming up on my left. I wish that I hadn't allowed myself to be so distracted by plans and my own anxieties that I hadn't figured out what was bothering Jamie so much. I put my foot on the gas.
My phone buzzed. I would check it when I had parked, I was dumb about a lot of things but I never texted when I was driving. It was probably Jamie, maybe even sending me a sexy selfie. I smiled as I thought about whatever it was that she had planned for later that evening. I did worry for a second that something might have happened to her or that she might need my help.
There was a silver blur to the right, just in the very edge of my perception. I remember nothing after that.
-----------------------
Unintended Consequences - Jamie
-----------------------
I'd done all the research, I knew what was happening. Hormones shifted rapidly during the first trimester. It was normal to have an increased libido. It was normal to have rapid emotional shifts, including some mild depression. Even the fatigue I was feeling right now in the morning, when I was normally very awake and active, was perfectly normal. I saw the doctor to get the last test and she said that everything looked normal too.
If I wasn't such a coward, he'd know how normal it was too. Then maybe we'd fight less. Maybe he'd help me come up with an explanation good enough for mom and dad, or our friends. I typically did that kind of thing, but my brain seemed stuck in either panic or fuck-me mode lately, which wasn't conducive to problem-solving.
At this moment I was simply focused on accomplishing the task I had before me. I was headed to the mall to buy some nice lingerie for the evening that matched the rest of my outfit. Mike had shared some fantasies with me and I had done some snooping. Well, investigation really. Mostly talking to Irwin about the kind of women, fictional or otherwise, that Mike liked to talk about (Irwin was one of only three other people who knew our secret, mostly because he was living it too). Things he might not share with me because, despite us fucking like rabbits for almost two years, he still sometimes thought of me as an innocent that needed to be protected. Sometimes he just wasn't logical about this sort of thing. On the other hand, his protectiveness was what made me fall in love with him. I've always been so awkward but he made me feel like his princess. I know how corny that sounds, but its true.
It made it difficult to prepare my last surprise of the weekend for him. I had spent a lot of time on my outfit, given that I only intended to wear it for an audience of one person. He would be thankful that his loving sister was so good at cosplay later tonight. I allowed myself to think of his face when he came home and saw me, dressed like Jill Valentine. His very favorite character from his very favorite video game, with very removable clothing, matching lingerie, and a willingness to role-play any way he wanted. It was the best gift I could think of. I hoped that he would like it.
Tonight would be the right night to tell him. I could make it right, relaxed and romantic. I could make him see that we could be good parents together, just like we made a good couple. It would bother him but I didn't mind putting off my education by a few years, if that was what it took. I knew him. He was the most loving and accepting man that I'd ever known. He'd view this baby like I did, as a gift.
He had to.
This is what I was thinking about when my phone buzzed. I thought it might be him so I pulled over. One missed call, one new voicemail. I didn't recognize the number. I listened to the voicemail. A very solemn, businesslike voice spoke
"This is Karen Bills with St. Raphael Hospital. You were listed as an emergency contact on the phone of a relative. It is not the policy of the hospital to provide details over voicemail but if you contact me immediately at..."
My stomach dropped. My vision blurred. I called the number. I didn't want to. I wanted to just sit there a while, live in the time before I got the call. But I couldn't. No one could. There was only one person in my family who knew enough about technology to use the emergency contact feature on his phone.
"St. Raphael Hospital"
"Hello? This is Jamie Parnell, I just received a call from this number." My voice was so stable. How was it so stable? Who was this cold, unfeeling person using my voice. I was transferred immediately, no hold, no waiting. Why wouldn't they let me wait just a little longer?
"Ms. Parnell this is Karen Bills. Your brother has been in an accident. He is alive but due to the severity of his injuries he will be in surgery for at least another hour. Details will be scarce until then. Will you be able to come and represent his medical interests?"
His medical interests. Interests like what is his insurance and should he have more surgery or should we turn off life support. This wasn't right. I was going to dress up for him later tonight.
"Yes, I'm coming right now. I'll inform our parents."
Then I hung up. I texted mom. She always checked her texts and I didn't trust myself on the phone. I drove to the hospital at exactly five miles over the speed limit. No traffic stops now please officer my brother might be dying. And he's also the love of my life so you see its obviously a bad time for a traffic stop.
I'm pregnant with his child, so it's a particularly bad time. Oh no, I haven't told him. Why would I rush that? We have so much time.
We're going to go away together.
-----------------------
Collateral Damages - Jamie
-----------------------
Arriving at the hospital was kind of a blur. They made me show my ID but I got straight through. Then I waited. Mom called, I told her everything that I knew, which wasn't much. I had a suspicion, but I didn't have enough information to prove it. Yet. I told her that I would be here if...when...he woke up. My voice finally broke and I couldn't stop crying for a while. Mom let me go. They wouldn't be here until tomorrow morning at the earliest.
I was in the waiting area for friends and family. Alone. I could smell the disinfectant everywhere. Had they just cleaned? It was making me lightheaded. Or was that the fear? I finally remembered that I didn't have to be alone just because my parents were far away. I called Irwin. He answered quickly.
"Jamie? Whats up? Need anything?"
Being my brother's best friend and one of the only people who knew what he really meant to me, I knew I could trust him.
"Michael...he's been in an accident. I don't know how bad. He's in surgery and I'm at the hospital. I just thought I should tell you," I wanted to beg him or someone to come, fast, but I couldn't. It seemed improper, like it would be horribly rude.
"Holy shit. Look, uh, I'm on my way. Don't go anywhere. Shit, you won't, I'm just saying, I'll be there soon. And don't worry about the others, I'll let them now."
And he was gone. Thank god he understood me so well. I was in danger of becoming non-verbal. Sometimes it happened. I don't know why. I just got so frustrated and...shut down. I wouldn't let myself today. Today it was too important that I stay aware.
What if he woke up?
(What if he didn't?)
I might have been there another twenty minutes. Could have been longer but when I looked up Rebecca and Trina were there. Trina was gently touching my shoulder. I guess they'd been saying my name. I stood up and they hugged me.
"We were only right down the road so we just came straight here when we heard."
"Thank you."
Before too long everyone was there. I'd assumed that at least some of them wouldn't have made it. But they all did. I learned later that Ellie took unpaid time off to be with me. They all said lovely things but I was just glad they were there. I didn't really need anything else from them. And it would have made him feel good to know how fast they showed up.
There was a man standing in front of me in scrubs. He was obviously important so I listened to him.
"Ms. Parnell? Your brother is in recovery. He's not out of the woods but we, uh, we repaired everything we could. I'm optimistic that if we keep his brain swelling down, that he will survive."
Survive. Nothing to say beyond that. Well, I did love him no matter what. And alive was better than dead. I nodded.
"I'd like to see him now."
"He isn't quite awake. And it's likely he'll be in and out of consciousness for the foreseeable future. He's going to need extensive, uh, pain management..."
"I'd like to see him all the same."
"Of course, just making you aware of what to expect. Go through those doors, the nurse will take you the rest of the way. Until he gets out of recovery your friends will have to wait here."
I nodded and began to walk. I heard Rebecca say something. I didn't make out what it was but it was reassuring. I walked down the halls, smelled something awful, heard the quiet beeps of the machines. Finally, she ushered me to his side. He was in a large room with many beds in it. There were only baby blue curtains for privacy. Huh, baby blue.
Oh god. I knew what he would look like but it still shocked me. I was sickened and then felt guilty for being sickened.
He didn't look like himself. I felt so much pain and love for him, but I just wanted him to look like himself again. He was swollen with injury and fluids; filled with needles and covered in bandages. I said his name, he did nothing. He was still out. I decided that I would stand by him for a while and hold his hand. I talked a little. I told him that our friends were there, and they missed him. I told him I loved him, but I was afraid to say how much.
I could never shut off my mind though. So I let it work. I spoke with one part, and let my mind build the story of what happened. He had a massive bruise on the inside of his left arm. The left side of his head was bandaged. His legs were both secured firmly and I suspected both were fractured. I turned his hand over in mine. They had cleaned him well but there was still a great deal of blood under his fingernails. And there were light scrapes on his knuckles, which glinted with particles of glass.
That fucking bitch. How could she pretend to care about him and then do that? How could I be so stupid? Why didn't I warn him? I even knew that she drove a silver Nissan.
It would have to be her, the only one that looked like me. But not as hot. I smiled despite myself my anger. That's what he had said, without thinking.
After a while, I don;'t know how long, it was too short. The nurse ushered me out. They were going to do some tests and then make sure he had the right medicines and then he would be put somewhere. She didn't know where, but she told me that she would be out to tell me as soon as he was situated. She promised to do it herself. I hugged her, which she didn't expect, but it was important to hear the promise that I would see him again.
I went back out. I told them the news.
"He's...he's out. You'll all be able to see him once he gets moved. It wasn't an accident. Amy tried to kill him. She tried very hard."
Everyone looked at me. No-one said anything. Had I offended someone? It was hard to tell when they were all as emotional as I was.
"Um," Julian said, "the officer was just here and he called it an accident."
I shook my head, sadly. I understood now. I saw him and I saw him the way I see things. Not like them. I sighed.
"He has to say that. But it was her. Greg saw her silver Nissan parked out front during the party. She had probably watched him for a long time. I'm sure she was still texting him, trying to get his attention, but I can't prove it. He was hit intentionally though, and she seems the most likely to have done it."
"Ok," Irwin said, "but would you mind, um, sharing? How you know?"
Irwin probably just would have taken my word for it had he been the only one there. He knew my mind pretty well. But the others didn't.
"He was hit from the passenger side. His body shifted to the right in the impact and his left arm caught on his seat belt, bruising him very badly. Then the left side of his head impacted the window on the way back, probably cracking his skull."
Julian winced, and I felt bad for him, but I couldn't stop now.
"Then he was upside down. His hands weren't seriously hurt but there is a lot of blood under the nails. They cleaned him up but didn't get there. That was because he was hanging upside down and his blood was pooling beneath him."
Rebecca had her hand to her mouth. I think Trina wanted to throw up, but I couldn't stop.
"All this means he was hit almost at a perfectly ninety-degree angle, which is rare, at terrific speed. I could calculate if I saw the impact damage. I think a passenger would have died. The way he takes to work only goes by a few residential side streets off to the right that are long enough to get that kind of speed in a four cylinder Nissan. Of those, only one doesn't have speed bumps that would make it impractical. That one is right before he turns for work, where he would be slowest and most vulnerable. That's why she was following him, to find the perfect spot"
"I wonder if she survived," Stevie said, "I wonder if she meant to."
"I think so. I know she survived the first impact so she was wearing her seat belt. His hands had scratches on them, and the scratches had small pieces of glass embedded. He didn't get that from the first impact, but from when she backed up and hit the car again. At least once. Then his knuckles scraped the ceiling where they were hanging and got scraped and picked up the glass that had fallen there. I think that's when she broke his legs. If her car still worked after that then she probably just drove away. But I bet it didn't and she had to walk."
Trina ran for the bathroom. I felt bad, but I had to get it out. To share it with someone. Rebecca hugged me. The image haunted me. And now they saw it too. I was sorry that they did, but I couldn't have stopped. It would have burned me if it had stayed inside me.
"Wait," Ellie said, "do you think he was still sleeping with her?"
I laughed. He was both too loyal and too busy to have done that. The things I had said the other day were from my own insecurities and apprehension about the baby.
"No, he doesn't even have the time to cheat and wouldn't do it anyway."
Oh shit.
Ellie looked confused. Irwin and Rebecca shared a look. Trina had just left the bathroom and her eyes got wide.
"If he isn't seeing anyone, how can he be cheating?" Ellie said.
No. My stupid thoughtless mouth. Always getting me into trouble.
"Now...now really isn't the time to gossip about my brother's sex life." I tried to sound appropriately offended.
"Oh god, you're right, I'm sorry."
Thank god Ellie backed off. She had already noticed that I'd been more tired lately, always asking if I needed anything. I think she'd guessed that I was pregnant, and she couldn't stop her mind any more than I could. I could see her lining up all the men in my life, like suspects. She wouldn't ever try to hurt me or Mike, but she might, given her crusading personality, think that he had somehow taken advantage of me. Or that we both needed psychological help. They she'd tell people no matter what I wanted, for my own good. One more thing to worry about.
A man in a rumpled suit came in, a badge hanging from a lanyard on his neck. This must have been the detective who came and spoke with everyone.
"Ms. Parnell?"
I nodded
"I apologize for bothering you, but we need to clear some things up. We've apprehended the individual who we believe is responsible but she's making some rather strange claims. She appears to have been stalking your brother for some time, and from what she's said it's likely that she was in fact spying on him last night."
Last night. When we had been...oh no.
"She said she saw your brother having sex with a small blonde woman. Were you home last night? Did you see anyone like that? We'd like to talk with her to see if she might confirm some details for us."
He asked the question so innocently, pretending to be unaware that he was talking with a small blonde woman. I could see that despite his careless appearance, this was someone who would follow this chain of questioning to the end, even if it wrecked the lives of the victim and everyone around him. He had a need to get to the truth. In the past I wouldn't have been able to tell this, but even before we had become lovers Mike had sat with me and explained how people lie and manipulate. He'd even role-played scenarios out with me so I could be better prepared.
People would love to judge our relationship but find me another man who would have done that for me, for no reason other than I needed help.
"Sir, I...I don't feel comfortable speaking about my brother's affairs while he's like this. I'm sorry but it just seems wrong. He was a victim and he deserves his privacy."
The detective sighed.
"Ms. Parnell, I can understand your concerns, and I know this is a difficult time. But a crime was committed, an attempted murder, in fact. So I will need to know everything and I will know everything, sooner or later. I'll come back tomorrow morning, and if you continue to be obstinate I'll have to be a lot less friendly about the way I go about my investigation. I'm sorry."
As he left the lobby I could feel Ellie's eyes boring into me. I could envision her trains for thought as logic eliminated one possibility and then another. Soon only the truth would be left. I had to do something about this, and soon, or else Mike would wake up to public humiliation, or worse.
-----------------------
Dark Certainties - Jaime
-----------------------
I loved my brother, and I respected him, but after being with him for so long as both his little sister and now his lover, he had a really hard time of keeping any secrets from me. I knew that if we were caught, his plan was to take all the blame and pretend that he had taken advantage of me. What terrified me was that it might work. It wasn't hard to imagine a scenario where despite my pleading he was arrested and we were separated forever. The thought made me shudder.
I would not allow that to come to pass, no matter how noble his intentions were. Better to out us now and endure the shame and rejection.
Still, there were our parents. It would horrify them, and they would become the source of endless gossip and speculation. How bad were they that their children had broken such a taboo? I didn't think that they would disown either of us, not once they understood that we were both consenting adults when we got together and that we loved each other very much. Having said that, it is likely that they would lose their friends, much of the rest of the family would stop speaking to us, and locals would stop purchasing dad's art. We could easily wreck their lives, while we simply managed to escape elsewhere and start over.
I would not allow that to come to pass, either.
The real problem was that my pregnancy would get out. Probably tomorrow when the police came back, but certainly later. Ellie knew that neither me nor my brother were dating, as would the police, soon. They at least suspected that he was having sex with a blonde woman. Of course, they would suspect that Amy was lying, but to what end? And Ellie would dig if she wasn't satisfied with the answer. We needed an answer that satisfied all parties: friends, family, and police. I needed help.
I apologized to Mike in my head. He would not end up being the first person that I told of our baby.
"I'm going to go get some food at the cafeteria. You guys can go home for the night. I'm going to stay but I'll be fine."
While I said it I looked at Irwin, significantly. I hoped he got my meaning.
"Oh..hey, I'm hungry, why don't we go with you," he said, indicating Trina and Rebecca.
Perfect, exactly the three people that I needed to speak with. I thanked everyone for coming, hugging Ellie extra-hard. She might have been a pain but it was from the best of intentions, protecting me and wanting to fuck my brother. I could empathize.
After they left, the four of us went down the hospital cafeteria. It was late but they were still selling sandwiches and drinks. We got some and I led us to the most isolated part. We sat down in silence. Everyone started eating, but not talking. I think they wanted to wait to hear what I had to say. I did one more mental checklist before I asked. It was a big ask, and I wanted to be sure that I didn't have a better option. I couldn't think of one. I finally spoke.
"Irwin, I need a favor."
He looked up at me, surprised at the breach of the silence, but nodded quickly
"Name it. Anything."
"I need you to be my baby's father."
Rebecca spat out her cola and Trina's jaw dropped. I realized that I had made a basic communications error but I didn't have a lot of time. Irwin must have suspected what I was getting at because he just nodded.
"Trina, if you could have an affair with Mike that would really help me out with the cops."
She and Rebecca looked at each other and then me. They clearly understood.
"What I'm asking you to do will be embarrassing, and if it gets around some people will think less of you. They might see both of you as cheaters or worse, in Irwin's case. They'd think of him as someone who knocked up a girl and abandoned her."
Trina and Irwin looked at each other and held hands. Then they both looked at me and nodded. Somehow they still loved each other intensely, and both of them loved Rebecca as well. It worked for them, and I wasn't going to judge.
"Oh my god this could be a lot of fun," Rebecca suddenly said, "we need a story. Something juicy enough that people will want to buy it but not so depraved it fucks up your friendships."
To my shock, Irwin and Trina looked just as amused as she was. I didn't entirely understand my friends, but I loved them. I realized that I was crying a little.
"If it doesn't work, and things go badly...I want you to know that I love you and appreciate what you're doing. What you've already done. Mike would agree with me. He always tried to protect me. Always. It's my turn now and you're helping me. So thank you for that."
Tomorrow was coming, fast. I hoped that we were ready enough.
-----------------------
Decisive Actions - Mike
-----------------------
I remember being in and out. I saw people. Once I thought I saw Jamie holding my hand and talking to me softly. I really don't have any detailed recollections from then.
My first real memories were coming to in the morning, being groggy, and surrounded by family and friends. That made feel warm and happy inside. Well, it was that or the morphine.
Jamie was close and looked down at me. She looked so tired. Why wasn't she sleeping? When no one was looking she put her fingers to her lips. Did she not want me to talk? Huh.
"Ok, I won't say anything," I said.
She put her hand to her forehead. Everyone else in the room looked at me. Oh hey there were cops here.
"Why are there cops here?"
There were two officers in uniform and one guy in a suit with a badge around his neck. He had to be in charge.
Our parents were there, and so were most of our friends. Something big must have happened. I wish someone would tell me what, I felt dumb being the only one who didn't know. And why was I laying down while everyone else was standing? I was obviously being very rude. I tried to stand up, but Jamie gently pushed on my shoulder and shook her head. I trusted her judgement.
Plus, it hurt to move. A lot.
The uniformed officers were talking with my parents. They looked at Jaimie with concern. The detective walked over to her.
"Ms. Parnell, I'm going to need to ask you some questions now. I'm sorry, but I'm going to have to be direct with you as your brother doesn't seem to be in any state to answer. We have reason to believe that the suspect isn't lying, but we need to know who your brother was having sex with last night. We need to speak with her to verify certain details...If you don't tell us, we're going to start making assumptions..."
Oh shit. Ellie looked like she had just realized something and had a little "o" of surprise on her face. I was suddenly a lot more aware of what was going on. This was it. We were caught, and it was time for me to step up. I opened my mouth to speak but before I could...
"It was me," Trina said, "I was fucking Mike. I came back afterwards and seduced him."
Holy shit, I didn't remember doing that. But I was really out of it so I guess it could have happened and I just forgot. God, that was a dick move. I looked at Irwin.
"I'm sorry man, that was a dick move. My bad."
But Trina, who had come over to stand beside me with her hand on my shoulder, wasn't done.
"But it was revenge! I mean we loved every minute of it, Irwin, but we only did it because of what you did with Jamie. You bastard."
Trina was really emotional now. The detective and the officers looked uncomfortable. Ellie looked like she was watching a really amazing soap opera. Mom and dad were just really confused.
"Oh god," Jamie said. She covered her face and looked so sad. I really wanted to comfort her.
"Yes," Irwin said, putting his arm around her, "Its true. I slept with Jamie."
Oh shit. That was so not cool.
"Irwin man, that is so not cool."
"I know, but it only happened the one time," Irwin said, "we were drunk, the moon was out, it was a mistake!"
"It was enough though," Jamie said quietly, all eyes on her, "I'm pregnant. I'm about two months along."
Holy fucking shit, I thought to myself.
"Holy fucking shit," I said loudly.
The fog that had been around my brain began to clear. I didn't remember much right before the accident, but the day before was crystal clear. I knew I was with Jamie. So everyone must be covering for us.
And also I was going to be a father.
I reached out and held Jamie's hand. Mom ran over and hugged her. In the background I was vaguely aware that Irwin and Trina were yelling at each other. Our friends looked horrified. Except for Rebecca who was having a hard time keeping a straight face. The detective was backing slowly out the door. The uniformed officers were long gone. Everyone looked unhappy.
I wasn't. I had a huge stupid smile on my face. Jamie saw it and smiled back, tears appearing in her eyes. I couldn't say anything, but she knew how I felt. That was the important thing.
Now Irwin and Trina were calmer and seemed to be talking things out. Did they work out a script? It looked like Rebecca was mouthing their lines from the back of the room. Drama students.
Irwin kissed Trina. Stevie and Greg were hugging. Julian was crying. Although it was fake, it was really touching. Not least of all because two people I loved had just embarrassed themselves and one had taken responsibility for our baby, publicly. There would be no shadow of suspicion over Jamie or over our child.
"This is seriously like some Grey's Anatomy level shit, guys." Ellie finally said. It was all the drama she could ever have hoped for.
Mom and dad didn't care about the rest of it. One child was injured but would recover with their help. The other was pregnant and needed their support. That was all that they cared about. At that moment I appreciated them more than I ever had.
Nothing would be easy, but at least we had a chance.
-----------------------
Recovery Options
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I should talk about how hard it was to recover. I mean, it was. Really. It took time and effort. Even though one of my legs healed quickly, they told me that the ankle of my left leg would probably always be somewhat sore, and that I would most likely need a cane for the rest of my life. The doctor said it with a somber tone like he was telling me that I had cancer. Maybe because I was still so young. I smiled and thanked him, to his confusion.
Walking with a cane is a ridiculously small price to pay for my youthful carelessness. I mean, yeah, I work on my leg constantly, the same kinds of exercises that I'm going to end up putting others through, but if I have to use this stupid thing forever, I won't complain. What makes me most grateful and that keeps me from hating Amy or myself, is that Jamie wasn't in the car. And so her and our baby were unhurt.
Our baby. Just thinking it makes me a little lightheaded. But not, as it turned out, anxious. I thought I should be. Jamie certainly thought that I would be, or at least unsure. The opposite happened.
I was absolutely confident that Jamie and our child were my future. The knowledge that I would be a father soon made me feel like I had been drifting my whole life, even when I was working towards a goal like my degree. Everything else fell away. I knew that my goal was to keep them safe, happy, and loved. That was pretty much as simple as it got. I was afraid, but it was like the anticipation before you get on a roller-coaster. Pleasant, exciting fear.
Plus, I found the idea of Jamie being pregnant with my child to be almost unbearably hot.
After getting out of the hospital, we'd managed to convince everyone that I needed some time away to recover. Jamie would come with to "help take care of me" given that my limp was still pretty bad. Irwin and Trina also went on their own vacation, although they were pretending to be "working on their relationship". The irony that the people who pretended to have cheated on each other were more in love than ever was not lost on me.
It had been over a month since Jamie and I had anything like a chance to be alone together with everything that entailed. We had rented a small, single-story beach house on the gulf coast. Just a kitchen, a bedroom, and a place to sit where you could see the ocean. It was enough for us.
The plane ride was delicious agony. As soon as we took off we couldn't help but touch each other. It was fairly innocent as these things go, but just putting my hand on my baby sister's leg was making me ache for more and I could tell based on her breathing that she wished that I would move it up by about a foot. We were both all smiles though.
It was the off season so it was a bit chilly, although nothing like at home. The skies were grey and low, and it was drizzling. I guess anyone else might have been disappointed by the weather. Not us. We were already going to be in a fairly isolated part of the coastline. Anything that might persuade other people to stay away from the beach was fine by us. It might have been selfish of us, but we really needed our alone time.
We stopped on the way and bought groceries since we didn't intend to leave. We barely got them put away before she took my hand and led me to our bedroom. She would turn out to initiate sex with me much more often while she was pregnant. I wasn't complaining.
I helped her take off her loose but comfortable sun dress, then her bra and panties. Although not very visible from outside of her clothing, her baby bump was obvious when she was nude.
"You look amazing like this," I told her for the tenth time that day. She laughed.
"You're starting to make me feel like I won't be as attractive once I have your baby."
"Nonsense. Then you'll be the mother of my child and I'll find you unbearably sexy all of the time."
"You say the loveliest things. I guess I should show you my appreciation."
She got on her knees in front of me. Slowly, agonizingly slowly, she unbuckled my belt, unbuttoned my jeans, and unzipped my fly. She reached inside and pulled my cock out, by now painfully hard. Before I could adapt to the lovely feel of her small warm hands on my cock she had started kissing and licking at me. I didn't know how long I would last but oh fuck her mouth felt so good.
Jamie took just the head in first, swirling her tongue around it, making me moan. She followed that up by steadily taking half of my cock inside her mouth while her hand worked the other part. She varied the speed and moved her tongue so she paid attention to every part of me.
"God. That feels so good, Tiny. I need this so badly, you don't even know."
She stopped briefly and smiled at me.
"I think I do know. It was all I could think about for the last few days at home and then on the plane. You were stuck in that hospital bed with no one to take care of your...other needs. I wanted your cock in my mouth so much. I missed your taste."
I think my cock twitched in her hand as she said those wonderful, dirty things. She took me back in her mouth, this time working me in earnest. She started to deep throat me, and I felt her small throat tightly wrapped around my cock's head. It was getting to be too much.
"Baby I'm not going to be able to last much longer..."
"Good. Give me your cum. Let me taste it and swallow it and remind you why you love me so much."
I didn't need any reminders but god the way her hand moved, the way she used her tongue on the most sensitive spot on my head. I groaned and came, spurting rope after rope of thick seed down her throat filling her small mouth. It was too much for her to swallow, far too much. I had been pent up for too long. She had to let me out of her mouth while I was still going, and cum splashed on her lips and chin and cheek, dripping off onto her full breasts. It was a mental picture that I cherished.
I went and found a towel and came back and cleaned her face and chest, gently. It was part of the way I cared for her and showed my appreciation for what she did for me. The other part came next.
She helped undress me next, as was our way. Then I led her to the bed and gently pushed her onto her back. I was doing pretty much everything with her much more gently these days. I didn't miss the hard fucking as much as I thought I would, although I was sure that it would come back after the baby was born.
I moved over her and started to kiss her full lips and then her neck, which made her whimper, then I moved down to her breasts. They were always a place that she loved me to touch her, and even more sensitive now. I kissed one while my hand worked the other. I took my time, licking around her areola before sucking her nipple into my mouth, simultaneously gently pinching the other one between my thumb and forefinger.
"Oh fuck...yes. Please, keep going. I need it baby. I need you to taste me..."
She had arched her back and then lifted her hips up, pushing for any sort of contact. I smiled but didn't want to torture her after all she had done for me. I kissed my way down and over her baby bump, finally reaching her sex.
Her clit and lips were swollen and ready, bathed and glistening. The sheets beneath her were already getting wet. She moved her legs over my shoulders to give me better access. I started slowly, just barely licking and kissing her lips. Then darting my tongue inside her briefly. She moaned and whimpered.
"Please. God. Please. I've missed you so much."
I moved up and began to lightly lick her clitoris, provoking some louder moans as she pushed up her hips to gain more contact with me. I jerked my head away.
"Not yet. Be a good girl and wait for it."
"Oh...you're so mean," she whined in her little girl voice, trying to manipulate me into moving faster. I would not be swayed. I could see by the way she was writhing under my mouth that she was going to cum soon and I wanted it to be as big as possible.
I started again, this time providing a little more contact with my tongue on her swollen clit. As I did so I slowly pushed a finger inside of her, eliciting further whimpers. She was close. I began to work her clit in earnest, lapping at it at a steady rate of speed while pistoning my finger inside of her.
"Fuck, I'm close. Please don't let me go baby please."
That was her code for when she was a little scared by how she was losing control. As I added another finger I reached out and held her hand in my free one. She gripped it so tightly, like she was hanging from a cliff. I took her clit into my mouth and applied gentle pressure with my lips as my tongue worked it directly. She ground her hips into my face as her free hand pushed my head down and her legs locked me in place. I hooked my fingers and hit her g-spot.
"Yessssssss, oh god its too much..."
Then she cried out and arched her back. It was high pitched and almost alarmingly loud. Her body shuddered and her legs vibrated and I felt my face bathed in more of her wetness. Finally she collapsed and I heard her crying softly. I moved up the bed to her quickly and pulled her to me. This wasn't that unusual or a bad thing, but while many people liked cuddling after something like that, she needed it.
"That's my good girl. I hope that was good enough, baby. You deserve so much more after what you've been through, what you did for me. For us."
Her breathing slowed and became more regular.
"What I've been through?" she said, "What about you? You were hit by a car."
"Better me than you, and not just because of the baby. I imagined what it would have been like if things were reversed. If you were in that bed, fractured and swollen. I don't think I would have handled it as well as you did, and I know it was hard. I don't think you suffered any less than I did. And you still stayed cool and prevented things from getting worse."
She laughed.
"I don't know if I stayed cool, but I was glad that I was able to do it. It felt good, protecting you for a change. You should let me take care of you more often. We're going to be together for a long time, you know. And I'm reliable. Speaking of reliable..."
Jamie had noticed that I was rock hard again. Going down on her always had a way of speeding up my cock's recovery process. She reached down and stroked it gently. I moaned completely involuntarily. Later I would notice that the farther her pregnancy went along, the more reactive I became to her touch. I was lucky that she was a good person, because she could have manipulated me very easily during that time, literally leading me around by my dick.
"Do you want inside me baby? Hmm? Is that what you've been thinking of for the last month? Being back inside your baby sister?"
She'd gotten a lot better at dirty talk recently.
"Holy fuck yes. God yes."
"I think we're going to have to start doing it a little differently from now on," she said, sounding a little unsure, "I hope you don't mind. You know, to keep the baby safe."
She rolled over and got on all fours, facing away from me, lowering herself onto her elbows and bringing her head down. I did not mind this at all.
"Of course not. I just need your tight little cunt so badly. I'm glad you let me cum first. I don't think I could have controlled myself otherwise. Do you need a pillow under your belly?"
"No, baby, but its sweet you asked. I probably will in a few months. I want to try it while spooning too, later."
It was just so nice to know that I would be sleeping next to her, spooning her, and having sex again with her. No interruptions, no fear of being caught. Just two weeks of togetherness, sex, and a chance to get used to the idea that my woman was carrying my child. For now, it just made me harder, more willing to fuck her and make sure she knew who she belonged to.
I got behind her and positioned my head right at the entrance to her folds, which were swollen and more wet than I'd ever seen them. She whimpered a little when she felt me there, and tensed up. I reached out and rubbed her back gently.
"It's ok. I know its been a while. We're going to be gentle, ok?"
She nodded and I felt her body relax. This was important for me to get right. The first time after a while. The first time since I learned that she was carrying my child. I entered her, slow and easy, letting her adapt as I went.
"Oh, fuck. Fuck its...more intense. Oh fuck, I don't...oh wow. You feel so good, love. It feels like so much more with your baby in me."
This new kind of dirty talk was doing something to me. It was making me feel more protective and turned on. I wasn't used to it but I loved it. I groaned as I bottomed out in her, finally filling her completely. It did feel different, warmer somehow. I started to move, smooth, long, slow strokes. Taking myself out of her almost completely before going back in. Every stroke brought a whimper and then a moan out of her. She looked back over her shoulder at me, biting her lip, lost in ecstasy, but love in her eyes. Love and desire for me.
I already knew that I wanted to be with her forever, but now I knew that I would find a way to marry her. To make her my bride, before witnesses. It may not be where we grew up or in front of our all of our friends, but it would be special. I began to fuck her a little harder, a little quicker. She pushed back against me, forcing her self down on my cock. She was so wet, so aroused that she was starting to cry out after every stroke now. Little, high-pitched noises like I'd never heard her make before. She was close but couldn't quite make it over the top. I recognized the frustration appearing in her voice.
"Cum for me Tiny. Cum for your man. I belong to you just like you belong to me. Show me baby."
As I said it I reached around her and began to touch her clitoris, which was large and swollen. I was careful to touch it gently. I felt her vibrate underneath me as I took my other hand and took her full breast in it, squeezing it and pinching at the nipple, a little harder than I would normally.
Her body began to shake violently, and my cock was gripped tighter than I'd ever felt it. I was deeply aroused but starting to worry until I heard her moans and sobs.
"Oh god I love you...pleasseeeee"
Her words turned to begging, pleading, and expressions of love. I felt my self responding and cumming inside her, as hard or harder as the last time. Streams of my seed poured into her, marking her, making her mine again. It had been too long. I finally finished, feeling weak, but she rolled over and shuddered, breathing hard. My cock came out of her, my cum flowing out of her well-used slit.
I quickly wrapped both of us up together in a blanket, pulling her close, kissing her neck, gently stroking her belly. She calmed down fast, faster than normal. I learned quickly after that night that having my hand on her belly seemed to calm her very quickly now. This continued after she'd had our child, and she'd always say it reminded her that I was her man and the father and protector of our child. We lay like that for a long time.
Later we woke up together, feeling very close. I made us some sandwiches and we ate them, barely wearing anything out on our porch. We fucked there afterwards, on the day bed, me spooning her. It was slow and loving, to the sounds of the stormy sea. It was the start of a wonderful blur of just being ourselves, making love when we wanted to, reading, talking about everything and anything. By the end we were more in love than ever.
We'd made it through the storm. We were stronger and closer than ever. Maybe we weren't ready for anything, but I felt, for the first time in a while, real hope. We would protect each other, and our child.
We would be all right.
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Infinite Endings
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"Oh my god, look!" Jamie said, bursting into the living room.
She was holding a box. This wasn't odd since it seemed like half of our things still resided in boxes. Her excitement on the other hand seemed deeply unnatural to me as our life for the past months had involved a lot of opening containers and looking for lost things.
"Um?" I said, hopefully. God I hope she didn't wake him.
"Oh," she said, remembering the sleeping infant not twenty feet away in our barely affordable two-bedroom apartment. Thankfully he was like his mother and could sleep through just about anything.
"But look," she continued softly, "it's your birthday gift."
I looked. I was confused as my birthday wasn't for another month. At least the last time I checked. This had been a confusing year. Speaking of confusion...
"Is that...a S.T.A.R.S. Uniform?"
She smiled, a little slyly and just a little sinfully.
"This is what I made for you last year. I was going to be dressed up as Jill Valentine when you got home. Got the wig and everything. But then..."
Her face fell, she didn't even like to talk about the accident. I hugged her. Also, I really wanted to be close to her because that was about the sexiest thing I'd heard in my entire fucking life.
"So, uh...do I have to wait until the next one comes around or can I unwrap my present now?"
"Hmm. I'm not sure I'll still fit. I'm still carrying around some extra weight..."
I looked at her. She was carrying around some extra weight, although remarkably little. Mostly around the bust and hips. I thought it looked really good on her, but she wanted to lose it all. I had no complaints either way. We were together, and I had realized years ago that I would find her sexy pretty much no matter what the circumstances.
"Well, I mean, if it's not too uncomfortable, I'd love to see you in it."
This was the understatement of the year. Jill Valentine was the hottest video game character of all time. You may disagree with me but you are wrong. The idea of Jamie dressed as her had made me hard in record time. She looked down at the very obvious bulge in my shorts.
"Someone definitely wants to see it. The baby will be sleeping for a few hours...yeah. Let me go see if I can get it all on. Don't be too disappointed if I can't," she warned as she walked to the back room to change.
"If all else fails, just return naked and I shall endeavor to overcome my disappointment," I said.
She just looked back at me and rolled her eyes. But she was happy. I think part of her still worried that I'd find her less attractive after she had the baby. That part was wrong. I loved her more now. I couldn't explain it, but once little Irwin came along, my life felt complete. Yes, we named him after his "father". I still had no idea how we were going to work out the mechanics of telling him his family history, but I suppose that could wait for at least eighteen years.
Mom and Dad missed their grandchild, but they came to see him, regularly. They were very impressed with all the things I did to help Jamie and said that I'd make a fine father one day. I had to struggle not to tell them that day was today. They talked about moving to be close to us but we persuaded them to hold off, and that we'd bring them their grandchild frequently as he grew older.
Irwin came out pretty regularly to see "his" child. Typically Rebecca and/or Trina came too, if they weren't home enjoying being the third connection in that love triangle. I thought I was a player. I don't know how he lucked himself into that situation but I wished him the best. The other benefit of Irwin coming out here with either or both of his women, was that, like us, they could just live their true life. No one here knew us as brother and sister. We were very careful to compartmentalize and keep all of our friends here separate from anyone who didn't know the truth.
I suspected, although I couldn't be certain, that we ran the only haven for incestuous couples at Caltech. Well, near Caltech. In Pasadena in any case.
Mom and Dad insisted on sending us money to help with the baby, which I was in no position to refuse, although I did make fairly decent money now as a licensed physical therapist. It helped with Jamie's continuing education, although she had quite a few scholarships. She was my brilliant baby sister, after all. Her most recent professor declared her understanding of systems engineering and model-based design to be "radical, intuitive, and borderline magical". She felt bad sometimes about not being around more, but I was willing to do more than my share until she ended up with her inevitable PhD. I had a suspicion that when all was said and done that she would be the breadwinner and I'd be the stay-at-home dad. I was more than fine with that.
The truth was that we were happy, we had a wonderful child together, and that, unlike a lot of young couples, we worked hard to be in love. We'd had to get past our fears, conceal our love, overcome injury, and more. We understood what was at stake, so we made time for each other. Hell, we even fought over things in a healthy way. And there was always make-up sex.
"Holy shit," I said quietly as I saw Jamie coming back down the hall. Or, Jill Valentine, who she looked remarkably like now. The one from the REmake, too. The best one.
She smiled her little sinful smile. This was the way things were. I had no complaints.
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Afterword
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Thank you for taking the time to read my work, you are appreciated. All comments are read. Non-anonymous feedback messages are generally responded to, if respectful.
At some point, Irwin, Trina, and Rebecca will return in Irwin's Big Adventure.